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McMouse

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McMouse
The British are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved". Soon though, security levels may be raised yet again to...
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McMouse
Due to a power outage, only one paramedic responded to the call. The house was very dark so the paramedic asked Kathleen, a 3-yr old girl, to hold a flashlight high over her mummy so he could see...
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McMouse
A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule, and a...
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McMouse
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to 'Honor thy father and thy mother,' she asked, 'Is there a commandment...
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McMouse
Little Melissa comes home from first grade and tells her father that they learned about the history of Valentine's Day. "Since Valentine's Day is for a Christian saint and we're Jewish," she...
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McMouse
She spends $15,000 and feels pretty good about the results. On her way home, she stops at a news stand to buy a newspaper. Before leaving, she says to the clerk, 'I hope you don't mind my asking, but...
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McMouse
A car gets a puncture on the motorway one day. The blonde driver eases it over onto the shoulder of the road, carefully steps out of the car and opens the boot. She takes out two cardboard men,...
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McMouse
I want to live my life backwards. You start out dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake up in an old people's home feeling better every day. You get kicked out for being too healthy, go...
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McMouse
I told my girlfriend I had a job in a bowling alley. She said Tenpin?" I said, "No, permanent."
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McMouse
I bought some Armageddon cheese today, and it said on the packet. 'Best Before End'
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McMouse
I met this bloke with a didgeridoo and he was playing Dancing Queen on it. I thought, "That's Aboriginal."
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McMouse
My friend took his wife to GP as she was behaving strangely. Doctor was puzzled and thought she was suffering either from dementia or HIV/Aids. My friend asked for prognosis and was told: "Take her...
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McMouse
.He is assigned to helping the other monks in copying the old canons and laws of the church by hand. He notices, however, that all of the monks are copying from copies, not from the original...
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McMouse
name three consecutive days without using the words Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, or Sunday?
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McMouse
This an unusual paragraph. I'm curious how quickly you can find out what is so unusual about it. It looks so plain you would think nothing was wrong with it. In fact, nothing is wrong with it.
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McMouse
A murderer is condemned to death. He has to choose between three rooms. The first is full of raging fires, the second is full of assassins with loaded guns, and the third is full of lions that haven't...
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McMouse
The waitress asks, "But, sir, what's with the ostrich ?" The man sighs, pauses, and replies, "My second wish was for a tall bird with a big a rse and long legs who agrees with everything I say."
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McMouse
The waitress asks, "But, sir, what's with the ostrich ?" The man sighs, pauses, and replies, "My second wish was for a tall bird with a big a rse and long legs who agrees with everything I say."
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McMouse
A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks for their orders. The man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke," and turns to the ostrich, "What's yours ?" "I'll...
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McMouse
A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small town in Nottinghamshire. With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde jokes....

1381 to 1400 of 1489

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