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McMouse

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McMouse
Can’t access AB on new IPad having forgotten p/w. Can’t seem to get past p/w reset routine as it is not taking the code. Help please...
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McMouse
It’s strange to live in a time when a child can’t pretend to be a Red Indian, but a grown man can pretend to be a Woman....
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McMouse
Husband: I want you to have this bracelet. It belonged to my grandmother. Wife: Why does it say “Do not resuscitate”...
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McMouse
Postman Pat hands Mrs Googhan her mail and asks “how are you today?” She replies “not so good Pat, the doctors put me on some sort of steroid and I’ve started growing a Willie” “Anabolic” says Pat....
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McMouse
Is there another word for synonym?
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McMouse
A sperm donor, a carpenter, and Julius Ceasar walk into a bar. He came, he saw, he conquered....
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McMouse
I asked the butcher for some tripe. He gave me a box set of ‘Love Island’...
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McMouse
What did the chemistry teacher say after getting two whiffs of helium? He He...
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McMouse
The scariest things about WW3 is UK is on the same side as Germany. They don’t have a good record with wars....
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McMouse
Knock knock. Who’s there? To. To who? No. To whom....
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McMouse
An Roman walks into a bar and asks for a Martinus. Barman says “do you mean a Martini” Guy replies “if I’d wanted a double I’d have said”...
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McMouse
I wanted to do a joke about tools but awl I could think of was this.
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McMouse
I used to date a twin and people would ask how I knew which was which. I said it was easy because by girlfriend had a cute mole behind her left ear and her brother had a beard....
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McMouse
I visited a psychic and rang the bell. She yelled out “who is it” I didn’t bother...
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McMouse
A Time Traveller walked into the bar.
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McMouse
The barman said “we don’t serve Time Travellers in here”...
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McMouse
A married couple is lying in bed. The wife leans over and says, "I want you to say dirty things before we start". So the man starts to caress her neck and whispers to here. "Living room, Bathroom,...
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McMouse
Husband comes home and says: - Honey, I invited a friend to have dinner with us today. Screaming she replies: - What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I did not buy any groceries, the dishes are...
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McMouse
Historically disgraced military officers accepted a loaded revolver from a brother officer and retired to their room. Is such a practice appropriate today?...

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