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lindylou16

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lindylou16
Something that maybe you didn't know. "Latte" is Latin for: You paid too much for that coffee....
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lindylou16
I have had my idea for a new TV show rejected by ITV. It was to have been called Jeremy Kyle; The Musical. Seems it has been done already under the name of The X Factor.
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lindylou16
I've woke up this morning with a terrible cold and lost all sense of taste ... I think I'm going to dress up to look like Wagner....
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lindylou16
I saw a Radical Muslim fall into the harbour this morning. Being a responsible citizen, I informed the emergency services. It's almost 6:00 PM and they still haven't responded! I'm now starting to...
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lindylou16
Swapped my wife's bed yesterday for a trampoline, When she jumped into bed last night she hit the roof....
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lindylou16
Is the Isle of Dogs the Isle of Man's best friend? .
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lindylou16
He is depressed because he has been having trouble finding a girl friend. Well the final straw was yesterday, he went shopping in Tesco and bought some condoms. When he was at the self service check...
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lindylou16
Apparently 80% of people who have cosmetic surgery are disappointed by the results. Which is a bit odd, because most of them look pleasantly surprised....
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lindylou16
The lead actor in our local drama performance of 'Aladdin' was raped live on stage last night. The crowd did try to warn him....
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lindylou16
I heard it mentioned today and i thought that rings a bell but i am not sure what it is.
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lindylou16
It was frogs porn
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lindylou16
The biggest lie ever? "I have read and agree to the terms of use"...
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lindylou16
I've just been dumped by my girlfriend. She found me creepy because I have a nickname for my penis. Guess now that I'm single again, I'll have to take Matters into my own hands....
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lindylou16
Being a man, he has a natural ability to multitask. In other words, I can f**k several things up at once....
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lindylou16
At a recent job interview I was asked if I could give an example of a time I'd multi-tasked. I thought drinking and driving was a really good answer....
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lindylou16
Sign by a road outside a church: Honk if you love Jesus. Grafitti added below: Text while driving if you wish to meet Him. Laugh i nearly dropped my Hotdog...
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lindylou16
Why are blow up dolls so UGLY
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lindylou16
My grandad is like spiderman, he doesn't have any superpowers he just can't get out of the bath.
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lindylou16
Women: save money this Halloween by going out with no make-up on.
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lindylou16
Does Lady Gaga just dress normal on Halloween? .

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