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Chipchopper

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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I have an irrational fear of German sausages. I fear the wurst.
07:46 Tue 23rd Aug 202212 answers, last by jno 12:49 Tue 23rd Aug 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I dreamt last night that I was swimming in an ocean of fizzy orange. It took me a while to realise it was a Fanta sea....
09:10 Thu 18th Aug 20223 answers, last by mallyh 09:42 Thu 18th Aug 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I really hate Russian dolls, they’re so full of themselves....
06:53 Mon 08th Aug 202215 answers, last by Patsy33 13:43 Mon 08th Aug 2022
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1ozzy

It's Thirsty Work

Fighting fires https://ibb.co/xDSkpSs...
05:44 Sun 17th Jul 20223 answers, last by 1ozzy 07:09 Sun 17th Jul 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I used to be a programmer for autocorrect, but they fried me for no raisin.
07:16 Tue 28th Jun 20227 answers, last by 1ozzy 07:41 Tue 28th Jun 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

A friend of mine went for an interview with an airline in Helsinki ten years ago, and he hasn't been seen since. He vanished into Finnair....
06:17 Mon 27th Jun 202212 answers, last by Chipchopper 08:53 Mon 27th Jun 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

My mate has a new girlfriend, who works on the bin lorries. The trouble is he can never remember if he's taking her out on Wednesday or Thursday....
07:50 Sat 25th Jun 20227 answers, last by Patsy33 12:02 Sat 25th Jun 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

Some people say filling animals with helium is wrong. I say whatever floats your goat....
06:44 Tue 21st Jun 202217 answers, last by zebo 20:47 Tue 21st Jun 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I caught my son chewing an electrical cable, so I had to ground him. He's doing better currently, and conducting himself properly.
08:25 Sun 19th Jun 20227 answers, last by Bazile 15:54 Sun 19th Jun 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I worked as a barber for a while, but I just couldn't cut it.
06:38 Fri 27th May 202216 answers, last by Ellipsis 11:52 Fri 27th May 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I saw this bloke who was a cross between an ostrich and a serial killer. He was always burying other people’s heads in the sand...
06:54 Thu 12th May 20224 answers, last by Canary42 13:39 Thu 12th May 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

The police have confirmed that the man who fell from a 15th storey night club was not a bouncer.
07:11 Sat 07th May 20227 answers, last by Patsy33 09:38 Sat 07th May 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

Dogs can't operate MRI machines, but catscan....
06:24 Wed 04th May 20229 answers, last by Hopkirk 12:45 Wed 04th May 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

What's on Chris Rock's face? Fresh prints....
07:03 Sat 02nd Apr 20226 answers, last by LochNessMonster 13:12 Thu 07th Apr 2022
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Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

The problem with kleptomaniacs is that they always take things literally.
07:24 Thu 24th Mar 20223 answers, last by Patsy33 09:55 Thu 24th Mar 2022
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bednobs

Chainsaw Trousers

my husband just bought himself a chain saw. i happen to be partial to all his limbs he tells me there "ani chopping your leg off" trousers you can buy. What do i need to look out for? Are cheaper end...
22:25 Thu 06th Jan 202215 answers, last by Chipchopper 07:56 Sun 09th Jan 2022
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Gardenlines

Pruning And Harvesting

Hi, today we have some pruning and harvesting tips for you! Make sure you get your last hedge trim of the season soon. We’d recommend leaving all heavy pruning until spring now, but you could still...
09:11 Mon 06th Sep 202110 answers, last by rowanwitch 10:46 Mon 06th Sep 2021
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Mags22

Tayberries

Mine has new growth, good leaves,but no sign of any blossom, do i blame the weather ? Is it too soon to cut it back? Any advice please. Thankyou....
20:25 Fri 06th Aug 20212 answers, last by Mags22 20:49 Mon 09th Aug 2021
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Cetti

Orangey Water!!

Last year I bought a large plastic container for runner beans. The soil has over wintered and I've just put fresh soil on top before planting for this year. Making sure the soil is moist I watered it...
15:59 Sun 25th Apr 20215 answers, last by Cetti 15:49 Tue 27th Apr 2021
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Giselda21

Ivy

I recently stripped a rendered wall of ivy. How best do I remove the sticky mess left behind. I've tried spraying beachy solutions, and washing powder. Thanks in advance....
13:57 Wed 17th Feb 20218 answers, last by Chipchopper 08:14 Thu 18th Feb 2021

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