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Son And Cannabis

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Le Chat | 17:57 Tue 05th Nov 2013 | Family & Relationships
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This is very hard for me to write on this public forum but I am desperate for some advice.
My son (aged 17) has been smoking cannabis.
I have had this confirmed recently by purchasing a test kit and sticking it in the toilet water in the morning, as he rarely flushes the chain in his bathroom.
He is at college doing a BTech. He was very clever but started skipping school and didn't do well in his GCSEs.
He was an excellent footballer but can no longer be bothered to play for his team .... and the story goes on.
He got money from various relatives for his birthday and yet I caught him rummaging through my handbag looking for money. I also had a beautiful Cartier Panther necklace, my only piece of expensive jewellery, which I have had for 20 years and I can no longer find it. He was not bothered that I found him trying to steal money from my purse.
Consequently, we have installed a safe in our bedroom and a coded keypad on the bedroom door.
I have told my son that he has to get a part time job (told him this 5 weeks ago) in 6 weeks time and if he hasn't then he will not receive any more pocket money. He has made no attempt to do this, despite many of the shops starting their Xmas signings.
His personailty has changed. He has become secretive, unpleasant, lies about anything, lazy, unhygenic and agressive. That is not who he really is.
We have talked to him about drugs and he knows all about their effects but I am so scared for his future and for our future as a family, as it is ruining our relationship.
We are a normal, otherwise happy family, with no issues. My husband and I love each other and are very happy and our younger son also loves his brother.
This afternoon, i asked him if he would accompany me to a drugs councellor but he literally laughed in my face and said that he'll leave home as soon as he can.
I just felt like I had to put this out here, as I feel so helpless. My heart is breaking.
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A lot of us in my age group tried the 'old ' stuff back in the 60s and it was pretty harmless, we make the mistake of thinking the new version is just the same but it is far more harmful.
//Hypognosis I have 5 children but only the one younger daughter has ever shown any interest in 'weed' . I know it neither proves or disproves the 'genetic marker' theory. //

I think you've misunderstood me. I was talking about genetic markers associated with schizophrenia, which appears to be a hereditary condition.

By contrast, there are no known genetic factors influencing whether someone might become "interested in weed" or not. If there were, it would be all over the papers in a trice!

Don't rule it out though. I'm sure there was a study about genetic predisposition to like/loathe smoking tobacco. Perhaps lump it in with anything related to smell/taste and, hence, food preferences/hates. The biggest worry I would have, in LeChat's situation, is that a son or daughter would end up hooked on tobacco.

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He is not on anything else, as the urine test was for multiple drugs and was negative for all except cannabis.
My next move after reading these responses, is to follow him and try to find who he is meeting and where and then report to crime stoppers.
This has proved tricky so far as he suddenly ups and outs and as our house is at the end of a long cul de sac, we have had to wait until he is at the top of the road and has turned to check for traffic before perusing. So I have been seen on a couple off occasions by him and decided not to continue. Now with the dark nights it will be easier.
This cannabis now, as Eddie says is very strong.
He doesn't smoke regular cigarettes but then I couldn't say that with confidence.

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