The Old Man...
One day Jesus was walking past the Pearly Gates when St. Peter ask him to watch the gates for a few minutes. Jesus agreed and within a few minutes he saw an old man approach. He walked very slowly, had a halting gait, long white hair and beard.
"How did you spend your life on earth my son?" asked Jesus.
"I was a simple carpenter for sixty years" replied the old man.
"And what do you hope to find here in heaven?" asked Jesus.
"I hope to find my son" said the old man.
"Well there are millions and millions of people here, how will you recognise him?" said Jesus.
"I'll recognise him by the nail holes in his hands and feet" the old man replied.
Jesus does a double take, thinks for a moment and says "Father????"
The old man looks at Jesus and says "Pinocchio??"