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marval | 20:51 Fri 15th Jun 2012 | Jokes
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A man was seriously injured in a car accident, severely damaging his legs.

As soon as the emergency room doctor examined him, he knew the one of the man's legs must be amputated.
He was taken to surgery, where, due to an administrative error, the good leg was amputated.

The mistake was discovered while the man was in the recovery room, so he was taken back into surgery and the bad leg also amputated.

When the man found out what had happened from a nurse who was present during the entire procedure, the man decided to sue the doctor and the hospital.

He consulted the best attorney in town, who, after going over the man's claim, advised him against seeking damages.

"What," the man exclaimed, "this is the most clear cut case of outright negligence I have ever heard of."

"That may be true," the lawyer replied, "but frankly you don't have a leg to stand on."


There was once an Indian Chief whose name was Shortcake. He lived with his wife Squaw high up in the mountains.

Sadly, one day Shortcake died and a very sympathetic Indian asked Squaw what she was going to do with him.

She answered mournfully: 'Squaw bury Shortcake.'

An Uncle died, left several hundred clocks to a niece, she's busy winding up the estate.

If Fairbanks Alaska passed a law outlawing all dogs, what would it be called?

Dogless Fairbanks!

Two rich young women, Tina and Buffy, were watching a TV show about the French Revolution.

"There's one thing that puzzles me," Buffy said, "If they were so poor, how could they afford all of that antique furniture?"

According to a recent survey by the Academy of Incomplete Research, nine out of ten people are

I drank eight cokes and burped 7-up

I used to work as a glass blower, but had to give it up as it gave me a pane.

A man was sitting on a bus chewing gum and staring vacantly into space.

Suddenly the old woman sitting opposite him said, "It's no good you talking to me young man, I'm stone deaf."

A prospector marched into an assayer's office and planted two huge gold nuggets on the counter.

"Well, don't just stand there, assay something!"

Two atoms are sitting next to each other and one says, "I lost an electron."

The other asks, "Are you sure?"

"Yeah," the first replies. "I'm positive."

Lastly remember

It is better to have loved a short man than never to have loved a tall.
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Tee-hee. You are giving us more than our moneys worth tonight marval.
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Glad you enjoy them Star.
-- answer removed --
funny :)
I like the last one!

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