News1 min ago
Bullies at work - slightly complicated situation
11 Answers
Hi All,
I work in a small office of 12 staff and it has a divide in the office between people. I think i have chosen the correct "side" to be friends with, however the other side have obviously taken offense to this and have proceeded to very mildly bully me psychologically (imitating things i have said in a stupid voice a few hours after i have said it, raising issues in staff meetings that they know will fall on me, not replying to my emails regarding work etc)
The side i have made friends with are the slightly older staff (i am 23, they are in their 30's and 40's) in the office, and they have seen this happen many times with members of staff (which have eventually left rather than say anything as this is how they make you feel). They have complained about it numerous times to our CEO which (although aware of the matter) doesn't do anything. I feel this may be that because we are a small office they do not want the hassle of having to lose staff and replace them. But now it has been said so many times, its not heard anymore.
Anyhoo, as i know this matter has been raised many times by my "friends" in the office, i fear that if i raise this as a complaint it will be treated the same and proceed to make the bullying worse as they will know i have "squealed", and also my other worry is as i am friends with the "old school" staff, it may look like i have been told to say something by them on their behalf? (I hope this makes sense?)
My question is - where do i go now?? If i mention it to my manager (who by the way thinks highly of me and would want to help me, but i fear nothing would come to fruition) and she takes it to the CEO (as is the procedure) and he remains to do nothing, it will make my life worse.
This is just like being back at school, its ridiculous, we are all adults!!
Please help!!!
I work in a small office of 12 staff and it has a divide in the office between people. I think i have chosen the correct "side" to be friends with, however the other side have obviously taken offense to this and have proceeded to very mildly bully me psychologically (imitating things i have said in a stupid voice a few hours after i have said it, raising issues in staff meetings that they know will fall on me, not replying to my emails regarding work etc)
The side i have made friends with are the slightly older staff (i am 23, they are in their 30's and 40's) in the office, and they have seen this happen many times with members of staff (which have eventually left rather than say anything as this is how they make you feel). They have complained about it numerous times to our CEO which (although aware of the matter) doesn't do anything. I feel this may be that because we are a small office they do not want the hassle of having to lose staff and replace them. But now it has been said so many times, its not heard anymore.
Anyhoo, as i know this matter has been raised many times by my "friends" in the office, i fear that if i raise this as a complaint it will be treated the same and proceed to make the bullying worse as they will know i have "squealed", and also my other worry is as i am friends with the "old school" staff, it may look like i have been told to say something by them on their behalf? (I hope this makes sense?)
My question is - where do i go now?? If i mention it to my manager (who by the way thinks highly of me and would want to help me, but i fear nothing would come to fruition) and she takes it to the CEO (as is the procedure) and he remains to do nothing, it will make my life worse.
This is just like being back at school, its ridiculous, we are all adults!!
Please help!!!
Answers
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Do you have an HR person, you should raise a grievance procedure against them. I know you think it is squealing, but if they think they are going to get sacked they will soon wise up and know you mean business. i regretted not doing it against a girl in my old work and when one of the other girls did she threatened me and prevented me rom saying the truth. I later got told that if I had been honest and backed up the other girl, the bully was going to get sacked. companies have to take these things seriously in case you leve and take them for construtive dismissal. And I know someone who did that and won.
why dont you try to friends with both sides? this is not a playground ( even tho it may seem like it) there is no reason what you cant be friends with all colleagues...
your older colleagues seem to be aware of this and more understanding so why not explain to them that you waould like to try to be pals with both groups and tell them you hope they will understand and not take offence at that...
your older colleagues seem to be aware of this and more understanding so why not explain to them that you waould like to try to be pals with both groups and tell them you hope they will understand and not take offence at that...
If they are causing your work to suffer then you have an obligation to do something, i.e. not responding to emails. DOCUMENT EVERYTHING! firstly contact HR with your concerns and see if they can mediate, if this does not work, last resort is to raise a grievance. I raised one about bullying - I got told they were sorry and that's all I got. For other reasons the person was dismissed and because of this they closed they case with a "sorry" - not good enough in my eyes.... I later got made redundant.
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