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Kids & food - what is normal?

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HJT40 | 15:32 Tue 18th Mar 2008 | Family Life
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Is there any such thing as normal with eating for children of about 9 years old? For instance what if they tell you that they don't like food and they don't like eating? They fill themselves up with Ribena at meal time rather than eat? They become more and more fussy with food to the point of inspecting it and refusing to eat it. They are however very happy to eat sweet food and stuff like crisps and MacDonalds.

Is it just a phase or it there more to it than that?

Please also bear in mind that the child only weighs 4 1/2 stone.

To be honest I am worried and would like some helpful suggestions.
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What is 4 and a half stone in kilos? - Sorry I have gone all metric!

My tall averagelly built 6 year old weighs 27 kilos (weighed at hospital last week), and his 7 year old brother who is the same height as an average 9 year boy, definitely weighs a kilo or two more than that.

As to whether this eating pattern is normal or not, I think you will find that the range of normal varys from kids who will eat anything, to kids who are total fusspots. My kids are 7 and 6 and there are some foods that they used to eat quite happily that they will not touch now and others that they they now eat that they didn't before. My seven year old is not keen on foods touching each other and likes to have his beans in a seperate bowl.

Personally, I wouldn't let them fill up on juice at dinner, I would allow one cup and thats that. I guess it depends on how hard you want to be, you could refuse them anything else until they eat what is on the table, or you could totally indulge them. I would favour a middle ground where some meals are favourites and others are a mixture of some things that they like and others that you would like them to eat. But don't force the issue. But if they don't have what is on the table, don't make an issue, but dont give them a substitute. As long as you are making sure that there are a good proprtion of meals that they eat quite happily, it will do them no harm to go abit short now and then to prove a point.

cont
When I was young, I survived for many years on Cornflakes, processed cheese slices and pork chops. As I got older, I ate a bigger variety of foods and while I still have some strong dislikes, I will eat most things and eat a full range of fruit of veg.

I think that we all have different sentivities of taste buds - my older son likes really spicy food, the younger one likes really bland food and will only eat saisbury's instant mash rather than real potato or any other brand - he can easily taste the difference!

I would give it time, but definitely cut down on the juice - even if you replace it with water and they can have as much of that as they like.
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Thank you Annie for taking the time to answer. It is my nephew who I am talking about and I must admit it has worried me. It seems to have gotten worse since his parents have been in the midst of splitting up. I guess I feel that I need to look out for him as he may be eating like this for other reasons. But you have put my mind at rest.

Thank you again.

Hi HJT40 it is good of you to keep a look out for the lad - he may very well be using his fussyness to gain attention if his parents are going through a hard time, but not necessarily. If he is happy to eat McDonalds and sweets, then it is unlikely that he has an eating disorder, it sounds more like he is manipulating the situation to get the food he prefers - given the circumstances, who can blame him!

I would persevere with introducing other foods, I will still make my kids have a piece of fruit of their choice before they can get crisps or sweets and to be honest by the time they have eaten the fruit they sometimes forget they wanted something else and I just don't remind them. I think that the choice is the key, they then feel that they have some control - don't know if this still works when they get to 9.

I did a rough calculation and I think 4 and a half stones is about 29 kilos which according to my kids health record book is the average weight for an average size 9 year old boy.
Sorry if i repeat anything i havent read the other answers.
It sounds like me the reason he will not eat proper meals is because he is given things like Ribena, McDonalds and sweets instead! The only way to get him to eat properly is to stop giving him this stuff, only give him water to drink and no junk food at all, i would say he can have sweets/treats if he eats his dinner. but best not every day! make meals fun, like having indoor picnics, making things like vegetable kebabs or fruit kebabs, soups are usually good as kids often eat them even with loads of veg in. he'll soon realise good food can taste good. could even teach him about health and his body and why lots of junk food isnt good. get him involved in preparing and cooking meals and teaching about food, he'll love it. it might take a bit of time to change his habits if he has eaten like this for a long time but it'll be worth it. good luck
It may be that your nephew is refusing to eat as a means of getting attention because he feels vulnerable because of his parents splitting up. Obviously too many burgers and crisps are not healthy but mealtimes should be a non-stressful event for him so enforcing too many hard and fast rules will only add to his stress. Maybe some nourishing but exciting little snack type meals like avocado dips and crudities of raw vegetables and fruit chunks will provide vitamins without forcing a heavy meat and two veg route.

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