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Family Violence

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Reetareet | 10:10 Mon 11th Oct 2021 | Family & Relationships
13 Answers
I was 27 old, loved and eloped with a man. I realized my mistake. But my mom gave a false complaint to Indian police that I stole all her gold jewelry and ran away. Indian Police caught and hurt me. My mom took me to her house and her own sister bought two unknown men and started brutally torturing me. My mom was sitting on a chair watching me getting me tortured. They brutally beated me with a rod, tored my clothes, stamped me, made me to bleed on my nose and knees, my own grandma plucked my hair and threw away. Her sister was stamping my vagina saying that I am greedy on sex and I was wanting to lick his penis. My mom didn't stop anyone. They took my certificates, passport and my belongings and locked me in a dirty room for a year with no contact with anyone. I had no food for continuous three days. Everyday they used abusive words calling me a prostitute. I used to get food only once in a day for a whole year. Several days when I sit in the toilet I never use to get normal excretion. Only tiny droplets used to come. I cried a lot. They treated me as a slave dog always abusing me with no humanity. Till the day before I got married I was tortured brutally by her sisters. I wanted to be loyal to my future husband. So I told the truth to him by phone call before marriage whatever happened to me and the reason behind it. My mother was listening to my speech and she told her sisters and they took a wooden bar and hit my head. Only till that I can remember. Later I totally became mad and mentally unfit. He got shocked the day before marriage that I became mental. But still he never gave up and married me. He got angry and planned to sue everybody. But they apologized and gave back my belongings to him. Right away he took me to abroad and got settled. He admitted me in a psychiatric clinic and diagnosed with PTSD, I was in sedation. I got treated well and came out of mental illness after a year. It's been 4 years since this happened and I'm unable to forget. I hate my mother and her family to the core. I blocked everybody's contacts and decided to not look at them anymore in my life even if they die. I hate going back to India. Even today I can't remember what happened during and after my marriage and how I came abroad. He showed the photos of our marriage and then only I realized I got married. Everyday I'm getting those bitter thoughts and ruining my life. Currently I'm pregnant. Please someone one advice me to get rid of it?
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The last sentence in the OP has been amended to... //Currently I'm pregnant. Please someone one advice me to get rid of my past experience and thoughts..//
18:52 Mon 11th Oct 2021
You are so lucky to have a caring husband. Apart from telling you to seek professional help, starting with your doctor, I don't know what to advise except look to the future with your baby and husband. I wish you happiness,
You can love your baby with the help of what seems a caring husband, do you want to get rid of your baby because you think you might harm it the way you were harmed? Can you go to talk to your Doctor who might be able to get you counselling to rid you of your demon thoughts?
which country are you living in? if in uk, see your gp or a marie stopes clinic for an abortion
The last sentence in the OP has been amended to...

//Currently I'm pregnant. Please someone one advice me to get rid of my past experience and thoughts..//
Do you mean get rid of the mental illness or get rid of the baby?

I'm assuming you're talking about the former. There's no magic cure for what you've been through and what you're suffering from. Therapy and time will both help you deal with it, but it will likely always be with you. The trick will be not forgetting your trauma, but learning to live with it.
Thank you Mamya, I crossed with your post, but suspected that's what the OP meant.
Yes, it was ambiguous before.

You really do need counselling to help you see that what you have survived shouldn't stop you having a full and happy life in the future.
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I mean in the last sentence I want to get rid of my past experiences and thoughts. Not to get rid of my baby
There were 2 similar threads...now one is gone? Was that the amended one?
Thanks for clarifying.
You say you hate going back to India. What need do you have to return? You are better off without your blood family, and after their actions you owe them absolutely nothing.

Your husband seems like a good man. I'm sure if he has to return for any reason, given your past, he wouldn't expect you to accompany him.
Apologies reetareett, lost in translation
Yes a little confusion re translation, but you seem to have got a good man, if he has to back to India for any reason at all, you don't have to go back with him.

Have your little baby and you and your husband enjoy your own family unit wherever you are living and good riddance to that family of yours.

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