Quips

[Bazile]

Her indoors shouted upstairs to me - ''dinner is on the table''

I shouted back - '' you could have at least put it on a plate ''

What smart a rse quip have you used / heard ?

[Patsy33]

"Make your own dinner!"

[Buenchico]

I walked into Felixstowe Tourist Information centre, where the word 'information' was spelt out in felt letters across the front of the reception desk. The 'F' had fallen onto the floor. I helpfully picked it up and handed it to the member of staff but I couldn't resist complaining: "You've got no effin information!' ;-)

[Patsy33]

^^^^^^
Lol. Smarty pants!

[DTCwordfan]

Not a quip but recently seen in the States,

'Due to the unfortunate liquidation of Circuit City we will no longer able to match their prices.'

The tag in the shop window that said this, the retailer, 'Best Buy'.

[Bobbisox1]

My friend...
I had V. And the kids for breakfast
Me, Really? I had toast :0)

[Barmaid]

Mr BM: "There's something wrong with the fridge"
BM: "Oh my god, what's wrong with it?"
Mr BM: "My lunch isnt in it"

[Bazile]

Some folk were once messing about on the water .

One said to another - 'you're gonna need a bigger boat '

[Ellipsis]

"Her indoors" ??? That's not very descriptive these days!

Not sure I've heard that since Minder ...