Just A Chat

[tinkerbell23]

I just fancied a chat.... no question as such!!

Someone tonight said “oh you are the one whos pregnant”

I replied that I was but am not now as it didnt work out. I almost cried, there were a few people around. I felt for the person too but it was really difficult.

It happens alot.... every other week someone random who dosent know my situation asks if I dont want any kids or how many kids I have!

I say none, but I personally think “one”!

Nobody means any harm, but god.... it hurts xx

[Theland]

As a man, maybe you think am not qualified to comment, but, consider a support group for like minded people in similar situations and circumstances.

I know support groups helped me. Not a cure, but hey, I felt more comfortable attending.

Ask your GP to direct you or Google it.

And never forget Answerbank, always helps, nuff said.

[tinkerbell23]

Thank you all very very much!!!

AB at its best xx

[tiggerblue10]

So sorry to hear this Tinks xx

[TonyV]

I feel for you both, having had to bury an infant myself, you have my sympathy xx

[ladybirder]

How very sad Tinkerbell, I'm sure it hurts like hell and I do hope it will lessen for you over time, eventually. x
I didn't lose a baby but I lost a gorgeous, funny, grown up son and the worst thing that was said to me was, "Oh well never mind you've got another one". I still can't believe I heard it right.

[Calicogirl]

OMG Ladybirder, how absolutely horrifying, I'm so sorry, whatever is wrong with some people? x

[Patsy33]

So sorry for you Tinks. I hope each day you get a little stronger to cope with this. ((Hugs))

[Theland]

Ladybirder - that is shocking.
Tinks - Keep talking.

[Calicogirl]

You okay tonight Tinks? x

[tinkerbell23]

Jesus christ that is the most STUPID .. insensitive thing ever!! That makes me so mad!!!

Yes thanks I am ok tonight I was out for a few hours- plenty of hugs and a few tears but a nice welcome back to the local slimming class!!! I used to help there weekly!! Xx

[anneasquith]

Hi tinks, been thinking about you and the baby today........ it’s the 11 hour labour , unspeakable trauma .

[Calicogirl]

Yes I agree Anne. I lost our twins at 14 weeks 3 days and that was bad enough but it was all very sudden and comparatively quick, poor Tinks knew a few days in advance and I think it's fair to say that must have been hell for her, and I think you're doing amazingly well and carrying a perfectly understandable sadness and I hope that you carry on feeling better. Always here to chat if you need it xxx

[tinkerbell23]

You are both so kind thank you!!

The labour as I said although a side room
Was the normal ward. I could hear other laboring woman and new babies.... see nice balloons etc out the window. I understand why..... but it rubbed salt in the wound for sure!!

Same with being admitted again twice for scans & baby ward. Difficult!!!

I know they are working on a breavement wing ... That would be much better!!!!

They gave me a lovely memory box and a little knitted moses basket for my baby to lie in! They made a horrific situation as nice as possible xxx

[tinkerbell23]

I really wish the bleeding would stop...... xx

[gness]

Hi, Tinks...oh I know folk mean no harm but sometimes you just want to punch out their lights!
On the day my baby granddaughter died I was on my way to the hospital...stopped for petrol and the poor chap at the counter looked at my face and said...Oh come on love....it might never happen.... :-)

When MrG died folk said.....At least he's at peace now, that's good....I put them right at the funeral....Peace!!!..I said...So many of you said he'll be at peace........No, he'll be bloody furious!

You take care...Ma....x

[Calicogirl]

Most people just don't think do they Gness, or they don't know what to say, I've only had two people be deliberately cruel, one on here and one in real life and yes I could cheerfully have chinned both of them :( x

[TonyV]

Lol Calicogirl will not want to get on the wrong side of you, you lead with your left or right hand!

[Calicogirl]

Tbh Tony? My Dad always taught me to stick the nut on people in a fight lol x

[tinkerbell23]

I always was mindfull when saying things to others.... but even more so now!! As are friends & family!!

I hesitated posting on here incase anyone was a bit brutal...... a few friends are well meaning but were quite harsh with me I felt and I didnt like it LOL

Im usually ALL for opinions etc when asked..... but mabye Im just a little too sensitive still xxx

[naomi24]

Tinks, if I can add my two-pennyworth, what a terribly sad time for you. Try to be philosophical though. Nature can be cruel but something wasn’t right. Lots of love to you. X

Ladybirder, awful, just awful. x