Golf Club Dinner

bookbinder | 13:39 Sun 10th Jun 2018 | Jokes

10 Answers

John is a member of his local golf club, and he arrives at the clubhouse on the evening of the annual dinner, to be greeted by the secretary. "John!" says the secretary. "The after-dinner speaker hasn't turned up! Can you stand in for him?" "Oh," says John. "I don't know if I could do that. What could I talk about?" "Anything you like!" says the secretary. "Just stand up and talk!" So, John gives a speech, and, as it's an all-male affair, he talks about sex, and his speech is very well received. When he arrives home, his wife says, "How did the dinner go?" John replies, "the speaker didn't turn up, so they asked me to stand in." "That's nice," says his wife. "What did you talk about?" "Erm, erm," stammers John, "erm, sailing." Next day, John's wife is in the local supermarket, and she meets one of the club members. "Hey!" he says, grinning knowingly. "Your John gave a good speech last night! He really knows his subject, doesn't he?" "Well," says John's wife, "I don't know about that. He's only tried it twice; the first time, he was sick, and the second time, his cap blew off."