Fruit Bowl?

[mushroom25]

this is an absolute gift for newspaper pun writers.......
http://www.lancashiretelegraph.co.uk/news/14904891.Miss_Orange_and_Mr_Banana_split_after_domestic_incident_in_Blackburn/

[douglas9401]

I can see the, ahem, a peel. Pithy comments to follow.

[agchristie]

Not much passion fruit being shown there. Orange was actually a Kiwi, who nearly retaliated with grapeshot and was clearly a damson in distress.

Banana, a prominent figure, was later impeached.

[Patsy33]

She was nearly a blood orange! I wonder if he was bruised? I'm sure he will a-peel

[agchristie]

They don't make a fine pear.

[Patsy33]

Sour grapes maybe. It apples me!

[agchristie]

Relations clearly plummeted.

[Patsy33]

Before the rot set in, I heard they made a right smoothie couple....

[Lunol]

I was going to start by saying it must be awfully quiet in Lancashire if this is what makes the news then read the story and must admit I had a giggle until I read these story headlines underneath

"Police searching for missing Blackburn man, aged 21, find body"

'I'm going to kill you!' - feud erupts between drivers at busy Blackburn junction"

"Police 'extremely worried' about missing Blackburn boy William Cowell"

'No, I'm a virgin' - pensioner asked girl, 13, if he could place his hand down her knickers"

And then wandered what goes through a reporters mind sometimes.