Acceptable To Not To Refer To A Woman As A 'Girl'?

[DonaldDuck92]

Here's the debate we're having. Keen to know what others think.

Is it acceptable for a 30 year old woman to refer to a 40 year old woman as "a nice girl"?

[MynameisLuca]

I think it's odd to refer to a female over 30 as a girl, don't know why but Women seems more appropriate, same as referring to a male, wouldn't refer to a male over 30 as a Boy.

[Khandro]

I wonder why "Dame" sounds rather insulting & yet it is a revered title, particularly for an actress.


ummmm, understood!

[Old_Geezer]

Perfectly acceptable. (Save to those determined to take offence.) But difficult folk feel differently and if an adult female objects to being described as a girl it's probably polite to make best efforts avoiding upsetting the oversensitive.

[Ken4155]

'Girls night out' and 'girls night in'. Both apply to the female species of all ages. Surely?

[emmie]

unusual but not totally unheard of, girls are off to lunch, maybe they are a mixture of ages..

[Ken4155]

Mynameisluca; Probably use the word 'lads' rather than boys.

[emmie]

go out with the lads, that has a better ring to it, they could also be any age..

[DonaldDuck92]

Thanks for the responses all! Was interesting to see what came up. I deliberately didn't post our thoughts on the, OP but our debate centered around the idea that there's a difference between someone older referring to you as a ''girl' rather than someone younger than you. More acceptable if it's from someone older and wiser than a younger person to an older person?

Also, most of the family felt more comfortable referring to 'girls' for a collective as in 'night out with the girls' or for a group of siblings than to use it in the singular.

[AuntPollyGrey]

In my opinion referring to a female as a girl suggests familiarity, ie 'she's a lovely girl I've know her for years, but also that the person would be one of your contemporaries -maybe no more than 10 years older. I have a friend 30 years older than me who I've known since I was 17- I would refer to her as a 'lovely lady' -calling a 90 year old a 'girl' is a bit absurd.

[10ClarionSt]

In answer to the OP, no wonder some people get depression.

[ummmm]

As APG says. I refer to adults as ladies but I refer to myself as a girl and refer to my sons and OH as boys.

I think that comes from me telling them off. Like not putting the toilet seat down or not changing the toilet paper.

It is familiar. I wouldn't call a stranger a girl or a boy.

[Bobbisox1]

I have a night out each week with the 'girls' all of who I know very well , ages range from mid 60s to mid 70s , we are 'girls ' having a good night out, I'd never say " I'm having a night out with women " I could say friends , but girls is better , for us anyway
Young at heart girls

[Khandro]

In the end it all comes down to a matter of tact, you do what seems appropriate in the given situation.
All languages have their pitfalls.

[Apc2604]

For some reason I hate being called a woman, but like being referred to as a lady. In wouldn't take offence for someone called me a girl. I would laugh and take it as being said in a good natured way.

[burlyshirley]

I was always a 'kid' to my dear Dad, even when in my 60's ...

I would quite like being called a 'girl' !

[ummmm]

My dad never seen me as a grown up either. Even when I had 3 kids I was still his little girl.

[allenlondon]

There is no doubt that referring to a woman as 'girl' is a put-down, however well-intentioned.

Would you refer to Captain Tom Moore as a 'boy'? Of course not.

Would you Thatcherites (god forgive you) refer to HER as a 'girl'? Of course not.

Would you refer to a group of (female) college professors as 'girls'? I doubt it.

My partner is a woman. What we call each other in private shall remain so. But I wouldn't dream of phoning the doctor and saying 'my girl is ill'. He'd think I had a previously unclaimed daughter!

Of the many feminists I have known and respected, none would appreciate being called 'girls'; and all would take offence at being called 'ladies' - another put-down, albeit cloaked in 'respect' and good manners.

[Bobbisox1]

don't know any feminists ( thankfully)

[douglas9401]

"I don't see why others shouldn't use the same appellation for them."

Depends on current thinking though.
I can think of at least one problematic case.

[naomi24]

//Of the many feminists I have known and respected, none would appreciate being called 'girls'; and all would take offence at being called 'ladies' //

Crikey! They sound a cheerful bunch! A laugh a minute! :o/

I don't think anyone would refer to women they don't know as 'girls'. That's a friendly, familiar term. Women I don't know I refer to as 'ladies'.