Mad Over Fifties Club

[nungate]

Good evening and welcome to Nungate Towers, after a busy (and for some painful) week, time for all Mad Over Fifties to come on down, take off their corsets and relax! Igor is by the entrance eagerly anticipating the arrival of our guests in order for him to stash away their outer garments and broom sticks for concealment around the Towers (who knows if they will ever be seen again!)
Tonight's Tailcock is the "Monsoon" well named and under current weather conditions here at the Towers, most appropriate.
As a result of the inclement weather we have decided to cancel all of our outdoors events this evening, sadly there will be no racing on the race track, or bonfires on the beach, guests may wish to wander around the grounds if they so desire just be sure to take an umbrella from stand by the main entrance.......
Of course the indoor pool is available for members, who may borrow swimwear if they have not brought their own, (members ought to remember that indoor pool does not approve of skinny dipping), as it is under cover, the hot tub is bubbling away nicely on the North Tower and his little friend the mini bar has been restocked and is awaiting his first visitors. The bungee is also ready for use just be careful not to bounce too close to the moat, the piranhas haven't been fed yet today (it's on Igor's list of things to do).
Our hot plate special tonight is meatballs in red wine sauce, (a house speciality) served on a bed of steaming pasta! We also have a delicious selection of volly vonts, horses doovers and canopies. On the pudding trolley we have an orange chocolate mousse, and of course, whipped cream!
In view of the nasty weather we have decided to open up our home cinema, tonight we will be showing that film classic The Maltese Falcon, and a short programme of Bugs Bunny cartoons (Nungate's favourite movie actor)
Club members who wish to dance are invited to the Ballroom to throw some shapes to the music of our favourite local band the Tone Deafs. I am delighted to announce that I have finally managed to keep those Minstrels out of the Gallery and out of the Towers, so members will not be subjected to their tired old madrigals and toccattas! Members are also invited to make full use of all the facilities here at the Towers, we have a well stocked library, which has all the latest magazines and periodicals, from Knitting for
Nuclear Physicist to Quantum Mechanics for the Home Cook! Our fully equipped gym is suffering from a lack of use and our fitness trainer has been terribly depressed from having no one but our chef Scoff to put through his paces (sadly Scoff is still the same size and weight....) All of this and more awaits members, so come on in and join the fun!

For the rofl tonight I offer:
4 fence posts,
a load of old fencing
half a dozen plastic plant pots

A warm welcome awaits all who dare enter these portals

carriages at midnight

[DTCwordfan]

a series of mini-catastrophes then....? Well know the feeling!

[DaisyNonna]

Thought a mandate was a command. Does he really do what she says?

[queenofmean]

Right I shall explain properly...Sibs..are you sitting comfortably...yes? I shall begin. The original plan was I was to be attending the Speedway with OH...I was then asked to work so I couldn't go. OH books tickets for event for this evening but I couldn't go owing to work. Then I get a text telling me the event I was meant to be working at has been cancelled owing to a family bereavement so ok I thought I'll go back to my original plans and arrange to go to the Speedway....it rains so much that my original plans fell through OH is on a date with his bestie and I'm here as I have nothing else i can do :(

[queenofmean]

I wish he did Daisy...when I tell him to stop tickling me he doesn't he keeps going :(

[nungate]

It started out with her being asked to help out, then the boyfriend asked to this "thing" tonight but she couldn't go owing to the helping out thing, so he decided to go to the thing with his mate, then the helping out thing fell through but she couldn't go with the bf so she thought Speedway, then the heaven's opened so she's stuck at home, warm and dry....

[nungate]

my version was shorter!

[queenofmean]

My version is accurate...shall I pass out my Party Rings?

[DaisyNonna]

Lie back and think of Scotland Queenie.

[Igor61]

sometimes a well aimed slap is most effective young Madame.....

[nungate]

of course, pass them around then

[DTCwordfan]

what's the Scot word for ghoulies....a well aimed kick should sort that one out, a nervous tic of course....ahem.

[Psybbo]

Hey, give the poor lad a break you lot

[nungate]

from long leg-ed beasties and ghoulies and ghosties and things that go bump in the night, preserve us

[DaisyNonna]

Two legged beasties? Things that go bump in the night?

[queenofmean]

DT the scots word for that at present I can't possibly type...not very hmm...lady like.

Igor... I'd love to but I'm trying to fig this hands rather than aim a slap somewhere.

Lol I wish I could Daisy ;) xx

[DaisyNonna]

Speaking of which DT, or witch. I would NEVER EVER feed a male of my acquaintance with a meal from M&S. I have too much pride.

[DTCwordfan]

From cuddlies and tonies
And long-leggedy sunny-daves
And Polars that go bump in the night,
Good Mod, deliver us!

[DTCwordfan]

just teasing, Daisy, the Co-op then?

[DaisyNonna]

If I could not produce a decent meal from fresh ingredients then I would not invite anyone.
What did I do to merit the insults?

[DTCwordfan]

Nothing, Daisy, just some gentle ribbing.....I too would be horrified to serve a ready meal...however, some of the Coop wines aren't bad, M&S too...their Ch Gillet is quite quaffable.