Insults

[SBell2406]

We're being really childish at work and trying to come up with insults...but they CAN'T involve swearing...Stuff that you used to say when you were little, or things like 'go play in the road', 'take a long walk off a short pier' and other such incredibly mature phrases.
Ta
Sam-x

[heathfield]

"When's your mother getting married?"

[valerieb1254]

" If You Had Brains You'd Dangerous"

[valerieb1254]

" One More Wrinkle and you'd Pass for a Prune "

[mccfluff]

'did you hit every branch of the ugly tree on your way down?'

[Creamer20]

well "Yo mamma" jokes were the funniest things in my day..

my favourite being "yo mamma is so hairy, that even bigfoot stopped to take her picture"

x

[pessimist]

we're you born stupid or do you practice?
or "when you were born the midwife slapped your mother. Or the variation on ugly, "someone took a dip in the ugly pond.

[soprano76]

your mum is sooooooooo fat if she fell over she would rock herself to sleep trying to get up!!!

[Snowy Owl]

He`s not wired up right.

[Forrey]

'he wasn't just hit with the ugly stick the entire tree fell on him'

[Postdog]

You have a face like a bulldog chewing a wasp.

[dundana66]

he/she is about as useful as rubber lips on a woodpecker

[Big Al1st]

Hi,
" Shame your Mother did'nt have children"

" It's a pity he/she uses their personality as a contraceptive"

" The best part of him/her was left on the park bench"

Rgds Al

[naz_nomad]

May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your underpants

[pickalily]

you're so spiteful you would put a blind man in a round room and tell him his dinners in the corner or you're so thick you'd starve in a supermarket and yo moms so fat she sets of car alarms when she walks down a street you're so snide you would hang a one-armed man off a cliff wits an itchy bum and (last one) yo moms so stupid she thought a set of traffic lights were a disco

[goldfish1]

You've got face like a Greggs Hallowe'en cake!

[goosing]

you're swimming in the shallow end of the gene pool

[new_squizza]

you've got a face like a dropped pie

[Whickerman]

face like a bulldog sucking wee off a nettle...?

[Xollob]

Said recently (not by me) of a colleague:
"You could lock him up naked in a round, unfurnished cell with two ball bearings; he'd manage to lose one and break the other".

[pagey3]

2 million sperm, and you were the winner?