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The Pharmacist

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Berniecuddles2 | 19:34 Mon 09th Oct 2017 | Jokes
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A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide."
The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?"
The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband."
The pharmacists eyes got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband! That's against the law! I'll lose my license! They'll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!"
The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife.
The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now. That's different. You didn't tell me you had a prescription."

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lol lol
A funeral procession is going up a steep hill on main street when the door of the hearse bursts open and the coffin falls out then speeds down main street into a pharmacy and crashes into the counter. The lids pops open and the deceased says to the astonished pharmacist, "You got anything to stop this coffin?"
to complete the triangle....

A man walks into a pharmacy, buys a condom, then walks out of the store laughing hysterically. The pharmacist thinks this is weird, but hey, there's no law preventing weird people from buying condoms. Who knows, maybe it's a good thing.

The next day, the same man comes back to the store, purchases yet another condom, and once again he leaves the store laughing wildly. This piques the interest of the pharmacist. "What could be so funny about buying a condom, anyway?" So he tells his clerk "If this guy ever comes back, I want you to follow him to see where he goes."

Sure enough, the next day the same man is back, he buys the condom, and again starts cracking up with laughter, then leaves. The pharmacist tells his clerk, go follow the guy. About an hour later, the clerk comes back to the store.

"Did you follow him? Where did he go?" asks the pharmacist.
The clerk replies "Your house."
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LOL
A woman and her husband approach their pharmacist and begin to ask questions like if the pharmacy checks for medications past their expiration date and the reliability of a certain company that makes birth control pills.

Finally the pharmacist asks the couple what's the matter. The wife explains, "In spite of using birth control pills I continue to get pregnant."

The pharmacist is astounded and asks the woman if she takes them every day.

The woman replies, "My husband takes them every day."
"What ?" the pharmacist croaks.

"Yes. After we read all those potential side-effects, my husband said ' Ah honey, I don't what you taking that stuff, it's too dangerous, let me take them."

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The Pharmacist

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