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marval | 15:38 Sat 02nd May 2015 | Jokes
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I love putting hyenas in old beer kegs.
It's a barrel of laughs.

My partner caught me on the sofa wearing nothing but my birthday suit.
He was furious, we never normally open presents the night before.

Yesterday I was drawing round criminals to make cardboard cutouts for my ad campaign, when I stood up to think for a second. I was interrupted by someone shouting: "Oi! What are you doing?"
"Contemplating." I replied.

I suppose when you've seen one lion catch an antelope, you've seen a maul.

I was at a pub where a man was telling really bad limericks, so some guy got up and smacked him. It was poetic justice.

I like to keep a collection of wardrobes in my house, but I don't tell anyone about it.
I'm a closet fan.

I've been trying to trace my friend’s new dress that I ordered online for her last week.
I've already used seven pencils and that's just only a half of it done.

I asked my doctor if he thinks I'm over my obsession with Tipperary.
He said "there's still a long way to go"

I just signed in to this cool new website that I've found. It’s called 'LumberJack.com'
But I soon got bored and logged out.

I can't stop thinking about prisons.
My mind works in Strangeways.
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very good
A few good ones there marval - Hee Hee.
Like them, marval.

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