SIGN UP

Is This Good Poetry/songwriting? If Not, How Can It Be Improved?

Avatar Image
ChristinaStewart | 11:38 Fri 26th Apr 2019 | Music
5 Answers
This is a poem:
Vulnerability
Does the word scare you?
Shake your head all you want-
even children are frightened of it
Why else do monsters under the bed terrify them?

Well, you say, it's a monster
it's meant to be scary
But why conjure it up in the first place
unless the real fear is the vulnerability
that sleep brings.

And this is a song: (first verse, post chorus, chorus, in that order)
Might have been a rose but you let me die
Might have seen the end but you made me stop
All the other ones got to see it through
Me, I sit at the bottom like it's the
top

And i can just hope
that one day I'll break free of your chains
All i can do is know
that one day there'll be a change

So watch for it do yourself a favor watch for it
It'll come when you least expect it
And until I'm ready to act on my words
I'll keep playing with your mind
Till i come I'll wait on cloud nine
Till i come I'll wait on cloud nine

By the way, these were written by me when i was 14 so be lenient in judging hehe. But don't shy away from telling me what's wrong with this poem/song so i know if i have improved any or not, because my poetry and songwriting still seems the same to me.

Answers

1 to 5 of 5rss feed

Best Answer

No best answer has yet been selected by ChristinaStewart. Once a best answer has been selected, it will be shown here.

For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.
-- answer removed --
Sorry, did nothing for me

OP says it's a poem, last paragraph says it's a poem/song, either way it doesn't work for me, and your reviewer 'leslishambly' doesn't work for me either.
Question Author
Ah so i see a couple people are confused :) Np though. The first bit of writing is a poem. The second is a song. In the last paragraph i typed poem/song to indicate i wanted people's opinions on both. Reread the post, it says above both pieces of writing which is a poem n which is a song. Oh n thank you leslishambly :) i'm glad you liked my work. To those of you who don't, please tell me why my words just aren't doing it for you too, so i can improve. I'd like to think i have by now, but like i said already, i find my thought process n writing to be the same now as it was when i was 14.
Chris, songs need music. Words without music are not songs. Crap words can be part of brilliant songs. What are you writing now that you are older than 14?

1 to 5 of 5rss feed

Do you know the answer?

Is This Good Poetry/songwriting? If Not, How Can It Be Improved?

Answer Question >>

Related Questions

Sorry, we can't find any related questions. Try using the search bar at the top of the page to search for some keywords, or choose a topic and submit your own question.