Damn Neighbours

[spathiphyllum]

My neighbours are so annoying, one has a dog that won't shut up no matter how much chocolate you throw over the fence, the other cuts his grass every Sunday (not recently to be fair) at about 7AM which i'm usually tired of hearing by Sunday.

So.. To make this year a bit more festive and cheerful between us all, i'm going to send some Christmas cards with offensive messages like "To the **** with the barking dog, have an absolutely ***** Christmas" and i'll sign it from the neighbour over who cuts his grass... then send a card to the **** that cuts his grass and sign it from the dog owner.

Bliss.

[hc4361]

I hope that you don't really feed the dog chocolate

[-SharonA-]

Lol!!! I like that.

[emmie]

won't work, you probably have already had words or have you? with the respective neighbours. It won't be bliss i can assure you....

[spathiphyllum]

I can't flaw the plan

[spathiphyllum]

HC, would i really waste valuable coca?

Brexit round the corner who knows how it will affect our chocolate supply.

[retrocop]

A well planned and thought out jolly jape.
Do you have a penchant for hospital food by chance? :-(

[spathiphyllum]

ohh they'll be none the wiser ;)

[Mexican18]

The dog is barking because you throw chocolate! It thinks it is being rewarded.

[hc4361]

I feel for you, my neighbour's barking dog is vicious.

[Rockrose]

Are you the perfect neighbour?

[spathiphyllum]

It's all a joke, i shan't be doing this, but it was something i saw online, gave me a chuckle i thought i would share it :)

I actually quite like my neighbours, i don't know them and they leave me alone... Biss ;)

[spathiphyllum]

RR what a silly question of course i am!

[Rockrose]

How silly of me spath of course you are

[spathiphyllum]

I have taken in parcels for them recently, and one neighbour even had the cheek to ask to "borrow" some toilet paper.. I said love, you can bloody have it, don't return it.

(I had no issues with either of these neigbourish interactions)

[kvalidir]

I don't have any neighbours here so yay I can be as anti social as I like :)

[spathiphyllum]

I passed yours the other day Kval, though i'd stop by for a cuppa tea but you make it quite watery...

https://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2013/03/09/article-2290626-18883FB2000005DC-297_634x478.jpg

[Bazile]

//...and one neighbour even had the cheek to ask to "borrow" some toilet paper.. //

I would have given the neighbour , one sheet and told him/ her - 'be careful now'

[spathiphyllum]

one sheet does plenty

[Rockrose]

Who jokes about poisoning a dog?

[sanmac]

Not too many neighbours here: https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-wales-46540282