What Kind Of 'Cruel Rejection' Would You...
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Benefits problem
27 Answers
On the 10th October my ex partner, and mother of my now 8 week old child, attempted to commit suicide at her home. She has been dealing with depression for some time, years in fact. Previous to this my ex partner even kicked out my daughter, my daughter was only 2 weeks at the time, saying she never wanted her in the first place. I took my daughter home and have looked after her and given her all the love she needs. because of this, I had to give my job up my job so I could care for my daughter on a full time basis. I applied for various benefits and grants.
To this date, I have still not received any benefit and have not got any money at all. After making many many phone calls, I have found out the following: This is a list of excuses from each benefit office that Ive received:
Income Support - To qualify for Income Support I must be in receipt of child benefit. Until I receive this, my application will be put on hold.
Child Benefit - A duplicate claim was made by my ex partner but was not cancelled when my daughter was put into my care. Because of this, the matter needs to be looked into to prevent benefit fraud. (My ex partner has written them a letter explaining the situation but the person I spoke to today at the call centre said he cannot tell me if this letter has been received and even if it has, the claim will still take a further two weeks to process).
Child Tax Credit - They need proof that I have my daughter. I called them on the 17th October and they said they were sending me a form to fill out and I should return that along with my daughters birth certificate and any other proof. Ive still not received this form. Ive also been told that once they are in receipt of proof of residency, this will still take a further 2 weeks to process.
I have carried on this question below...
To this date, I have still not received any benefit and have not got any money at all. After making many many phone calls, I have found out the following: This is a list of excuses from each benefit office that Ive received:
Income Support - To qualify for Income Support I must be in receipt of child benefit. Until I receive this, my application will be put on hold.
Child Benefit - A duplicate claim was made by my ex partner but was not cancelled when my daughter was put into my care. Because of this, the matter needs to be looked into to prevent benefit fraud. (My ex partner has written them a letter explaining the situation but the person I spoke to today at the call centre said he cannot tell me if this letter has been received and even if it has, the claim will still take a further two weeks to process).
Child Tax Credit - They need proof that I have my daughter. I called them on the 17th October and they said they were sending me a form to fill out and I should return that along with my daughters birth certificate and any other proof. Ive still not received this form. Ive also been told that once they are in receipt of proof of residency, this will still take a further 2 weeks to process.
I have carried on this question below...
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Housing and council tax benefit - They have said that no claim form or information has been received even though Income Support said they sent it on the 10th October.
All this is also holding up a residency order which I hope a court will serve so that, legally, my daughter will remain with me. As I have no income, I will need legal aid but I do not qualify at the moment until I receive Income Support. I have another legal matter which is being held up as well. Both are of the highest urgency
As you can see, i'm in dire straits. I face losing my daughter, my home and everything I have to, what it seems, the hold up at the child benefit office and of course the loss of my form sent to Housing. I have just missed my Gas, Electric and Water payments and also have a couple of other bills due very soon. One being my phone which is my only source to the outside world.
This has left me with no money to buy food for my daughter or myself. I have exhausted all funds I did have, I have borrowed my last penny from friends and family. My land lord will be knocking on my door at the end of the month for his rent. My landlord is a violent man and he has already attempted to knock my door down before. I will definately lose the flat we live in if I cannot pay him on time.
I have a Social Worker, he is trying to help me sort this out but he is hitting as many brick walls as I am. I'm worried this will be become a child protection case because we may become homeless if this is not sorted out very soon.
Can anyone give me some advice please?
All this is also holding up a residency order which I hope a court will serve so that, legally, my daughter will remain with me. As I have no income, I will need legal aid but I do not qualify at the moment until I receive Income Support. I have another legal matter which is being held up as well. Both are of the highest urgency
As you can see, i'm in dire straits. I face losing my daughter, my home and everything I have to, what it seems, the hold up at the child benefit office and of course the loss of my form sent to Housing. I have just missed my Gas, Electric and Water payments and also have a couple of other bills due very soon. One being my phone which is my only source to the outside world.
This has left me with no money to buy food for my daughter or myself. I have exhausted all funds I did have, I have borrowed my last penny from friends and family. My land lord will be knocking on my door at the end of the month for his rent. My landlord is a violent man and he has already attempted to knock my door down before. I will definately lose the flat we live in if I cannot pay him on time.
I have a Social Worker, he is trying to help me sort this out but he is hitting as many brick walls as I am. I'm worried this will be become a child protection case because we may become homeless if this is not sorted out very soon.
Can anyone give me some advice please?
Hi there,
I'm terribly sorry to read your situation but unfotunately I'm not in a position to give you any kind of helpful advice regarding the benefits problem.
In the meantime, to at least scrape enough money for essentials for you and your daughter, can you not sell some non essentials? I'm sure it's absolutely necessary you have a computer (which would also eliminate the cost of broadband too), the microwave, you can heat milk for your daughter the traidtional pan of simmering water way...etc.
You may not get much for some thing, but it's better than nothing at all.
I wish you all the best.
I'm terribly sorry to read your situation but unfotunately I'm not in a position to give you any kind of helpful advice regarding the benefits problem.
In the meantime, to at least scrape enough money for essentials for you and your daughter, can you not sell some non essentials? I'm sure it's absolutely necessary you have a computer (which would also eliminate the cost of broadband too), the microwave, you can heat milk for your daughter the traidtional pan of simmering water way...etc.
You may not get much for some thing, but it's better than nothing at all.
I wish you all the best.
I�m terribly sorry to hear how difficult this is. This is clear evidence of how people can become caught in the cracks of our social systems, causing grief and disruption for all.
In the first instance, I encourage you to visit your local citizen�s advice office. They have direct connections to not only social services, where they can expedite these matters and have them passed up to a supervisory level, but they also have direct connections to creditors, such as BT and the utility boards. Invest your time in using them. Please, do try to see them tomorrow. They can and do help, especially in these circumstances. Additionally, they occasionally have access to other programmes that provide further emergency assistance for people who are caught in these circumstances.
Continued
In the first instance, I encourage you to visit your local citizen�s advice office. They have direct connections to not only social services, where they can expedite these matters and have them passed up to a supervisory level, but they also have direct connections to creditors, such as BT and the utility boards. Invest your time in using them. Please, do try to see them tomorrow. They can and do help, especially in these circumstances. Additionally, they occasionally have access to other programmes that provide further emergency assistance for people who are caught in these circumstances.
Continued
Part 2
From your statement, I would gather you may have had difficulty in paying your rent before? Otherwise, I can�t imagine why your landlord would have been threatening to kick your door down. There are two thoughts along these lines. First, should he do this again, or threaten you in any way, especially where there is a child present, phone the police immediately! Do not delay in this. Not only does it provide protection, it provides documentary evidence for you to present for emergency housing. This also forces the social welfare system to take the essential steps to sort the gap that exists between child benefits, DWP and housing benefit. It might also be a wise move to visit your GP, ensuring the child is properly registered with the GP and documentation of your concerns regarding becoming homeless and the need to care for your child.
If it is your inclination, for emotional support, you may also wish to contact your local clergy. I don�t know where you reside, but there are some excellent support programmes offered from diocese to diocese. They are conditionally non-religious, meaning they are there to serve everyone, not just someone of a particular faith.
I wish you every success
Fr Bill
From your statement, I would gather you may have had difficulty in paying your rent before? Otherwise, I can�t imagine why your landlord would have been threatening to kick your door down. There are two thoughts along these lines. First, should he do this again, or threaten you in any way, especially where there is a child present, phone the police immediately! Do not delay in this. Not only does it provide protection, it provides documentary evidence for you to present for emergency housing. This also forces the social welfare system to take the essential steps to sort the gap that exists between child benefits, DWP and housing benefit. It might also be a wise move to visit your GP, ensuring the child is properly registered with the GP and documentation of your concerns regarding becoming homeless and the need to care for your child.
If it is your inclination, for emotional support, you may also wish to contact your local clergy. I don�t know where you reside, but there are some excellent support programmes offered from diocese to diocese. They are conditionally non-religious, meaning they are there to serve everyone, not just someone of a particular faith.
I wish you every success
Fr Bill
I sympathise because it sounds like all three of you are in a cr*ap situation. You need some help and you need to kick your social worker up the bahookie.
Firstly, you need to clarify why you have a social worker. Is it for you as an individual, or is it for you because you have responsibility for the child?
If a social worker has responsibility for a parent and child that should make your case more urgent.
You need to establish who has responsibility for the child. That could mean that you have responsibility and that it will be reviewed depending on your partner's condition and treatment. If your partner is co-operative it should be simple enough to do. Your social worker should be able to advise whether you need to approach the court for a formal order.
Your benefit decision may be held up if DWP need to clarify the details of the child and who has day-to-day responsibility. From what you say, you are claiming Income Support because you have to look after the child. Your partner needs to provide supportiing evidence to explain that you have sole responsibility for the child.
It would be easier if you were receiving the Child Benefit because that show you have the child. It would help if you could get your partner to provide a written statement to explain that you have sole responsibility for the child (even if it is for a period of a few months).
Firstly, you need to clarify why you have a social worker. Is it for you as an individual, or is it for you because you have responsibility for the child?
If a social worker has responsibility for a parent and child that should make your case more urgent.
You need to establish who has responsibility for the child. That could mean that you have responsibility and that it will be reviewed depending on your partner's condition and treatment. If your partner is co-operative it should be simple enough to do. Your social worker should be able to advise whether you need to approach the court for a formal order.
Your benefit decision may be held up if DWP need to clarify the details of the child and who has day-to-day responsibility. From what you say, you are claiming Income Support because you have to look after the child. Your partner needs to provide supportiing evidence to explain that you have sole responsibility for the child.
It would be easier if you were receiving the Child Benefit because that show you have the child. It would help if you could get your partner to provide a written statement to explain that you have sole responsibility for the child (even if it is for a period of a few months).
Part 2
You need to complete claim forms for Housing Benefit and Council Tax Benefit. Get them from your local council/local authority.
If possible, explain to your landlord that you are having some problems. If you have responsibility for the child the Social Worker should be able to intervene with the landlord, especially if threats or violence are involved.
Your utility bills are less important at this time.
You're unlikely to be able to claim both welfare benefits and tax cedits.
In terms of access to cash, if you have provided all the information asked of you you can ask for an interim payment or emergency payment of your Income Support. You may have to ask to speak to the decision maker in your case. Social Work should be able to consider access to additional hardship funds.
Otherwise you should be eligible to claim for a crisis loan because you have responsibility for a child, you could claim a budgeting loan because you may need to provide for the child.
To wrap up, get in touch with your social worker. You may also find it helpful to get someone from your local Citizens Advice Bureau to help you handle any difficulties with your social worker. I'm an adviser with a CAB bureau and am certain that your local bureau has got fast-track procedures to help urgent cases.
As the wonderful Village Vicar suggests you may also need some emotional support. Try the Gingerbread helpline 0800 018 5026.
Good luck to all three of you.
You need to complete claim forms for Housing Benefit and Council Tax Benefit. Get them from your local council/local authority.
If possible, explain to your landlord that you are having some problems. If you have responsibility for the child the Social Worker should be able to intervene with the landlord, especially if threats or violence are involved.
Your utility bills are less important at this time.
You're unlikely to be able to claim both welfare benefits and tax cedits.
In terms of access to cash, if you have provided all the information asked of you you can ask for an interim payment or emergency payment of your Income Support. You may have to ask to speak to the decision maker in your case. Social Work should be able to consider access to additional hardship funds.
Otherwise you should be eligible to claim for a crisis loan because you have responsibility for a child, you could claim a budgeting loan because you may need to provide for the child.
To wrap up, get in touch with your social worker. You may also find it helpful to get someone from your local Citizens Advice Bureau to help you handle any difficulties with your social worker. I'm an adviser with a CAB bureau and am certain that your local bureau has got fast-track procedures to help urgent cases.
As the wonderful Village Vicar suggests you may also need some emotional support. Try the Gingerbread helpline 0800 018 5026.
Good luck to all three of you.
I know how bad it is, how frustrated you feel. How explaining things over and over to people who them do nothing to help, can suck the very life force from your body. I have no magic solution - Sorry!These people take their own sweet time and it is all a catch twenty two situation ... I lived through it with my best mate ( you need to vent about the inconsistencies of the system to someone ... ) My best mate is now a Headmistress in a disadvantaged area of the Country, we spent many a night in tears. You are not alone ... if you need to see a Doctor to cope with some of the stress please do not hesitate. It got so bad one time my friend asked the local housing officer if she had a bin, ( she was chewing gum at the time ) the housing officer lifted the bin and rolled her eyes my friend picked up her applications and file and put it in the bin crying and saying I just want to save you the bother of doing it when I leave your office. I took another couple of weeks to right itself but it was definately a very dark time for her. You have to accept ( not like ) that you are going to go into debt and miss some bill payments your only priority during this whole hideous mess is to hang onto your child. I am going to do a bit of research on the web to see if any help is out there. Hugs and love in the meantime. Sense4all.
i am so sorry to hear of this situation you find yourself in lonedad.
can you not claim unemployment benefit instead of income support for the time being? they will pay you back pay to the date of your claim
as i think was stated above you should be able to claim for a crisis loan.
http://www.jobcentreplus.gov.uk/JCP/Customers/ WorkingAgeBenefits/Dev_013949.xml.html
please get in touch with your local citizens advice first thing in the morning, they are very helpful.
I wish you all the luck in the world and hope things improve for you soon xxx
can you not claim unemployment benefit instead of income support for the time being? they will pay you back pay to the date of your claim
as i think was stated above you should be able to claim for a crisis loan.
http://www.jobcentreplus.gov.uk/JCP/Customers/ WorkingAgeBenefits/Dev_013949.xml.html
please get in touch with your local citizens advice first thing in the morning, they are very helpful.
I wish you all the luck in the world and hope things improve for you soon xxx
http://www.home-start.org.uk/needsupport/
http://www.fwa.org.uk/Grants.html
http://www.childrenneedfamilies.co.uk/
http://www.gingerbread.org.uk/
http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/MoneyTaxAndBenefit s/BenefitsTaxCreditsAndOtherSupport/On_a_low_i ncome/DG_10018856
Hope there is something helpful to you on these sites ...
love Sense. X.
http://www.fwa.org.uk/Grants.html
http://www.childrenneedfamilies.co.uk/
http://www.gingerbread.org.uk/
http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/MoneyTaxAndBenefit s/BenefitsTaxCreditsAndOtherSupport/On_a_low_i ncome/DG_10018856
Hope there is something helpful to you on these sites ...
love Sense. X.
Have you made a claim for a Crisis Loan? If not contact the Social Fund in the morning.
I'm sure that many in yir situation would be very stressed, if not depressed by the whole situation and being unfit for work is another condition for receiving Income Support. A claim for Incapacity Benefit has to be made and that would need to be supported by a Doctor's certificate. Claims can be backdated but a Doctor would need to say that person was unfit for work for that past period.
If that sounds like you, make a claim for Incapacity Benefit.
You'll not be able to claim Jobseeker's Allowance because you have to be available for work and you're not that at the moment.
I'm sure that many in yir situation would be very stressed, if not depressed by the whole situation and being unfit for work is another condition for receiving Income Support. A claim for Incapacity Benefit has to be made and that would need to be supported by a Doctor's certificate. Claims can be backdated but a Doctor would need to say that person was unfit for work for that past period.
If that sounds like you, make a claim for Incapacity Benefit.
You'll not be able to claim Jobseeker's Allowance because you have to be available for work and you're not that at the moment.
May I first say thank you so much for all your replys and messages of support. You hear so much about the benefit scammers in this country but rarely hear about the flip side.
Dakota - Ive thought about selling some of my stuff. The PC has been a God send to be honest. I think once i'm halfway near sorting this out then ill get rid of it. Its 6 years old so i doubt if it'll go for much. I really havent got much to sell to be honest.
V V - I will contact the CAB as soon as possible. I'm planning to go into the Housing Office tomorrow to sort out this claim and also put a housing application in. I know that my local CAB closes at 12.30 tomorrow but you need to get to the Housing early enough to get seen. I will go to CAB on Friday I think. I've always been put off by CAB because of how long you need to wait to see someone. Waiting isnt always a good idea with a 8 week old lol. I tried to hold my landlord off last month for as long as I could with the rent. He then became abusive so i shut the door on him. He then kept ramming the door with his shoulder. I did call the Police but they said they couldnt do anything because he had gone. My daughters health visitor and doctor know about all this and its all documented somewhere. Thanks for telling me about gingerbread, ill have a look at their website in a bit.
Dakota - Ive thought about selling some of my stuff. The PC has been a God send to be honest. I think once i'm halfway near sorting this out then ill get rid of it. Its 6 years old so i doubt if it'll go for much. I really havent got much to sell to be honest.
V V - I will contact the CAB as soon as possible. I'm planning to go into the Housing Office tomorrow to sort out this claim and also put a housing application in. I know that my local CAB closes at 12.30 tomorrow but you need to get to the Housing early enough to get seen. I will go to CAB on Friday I think. I've always been put off by CAB because of how long you need to wait to see someone. Waiting isnt always a good idea with a 8 week old lol. I tried to hold my landlord off last month for as long as I could with the rent. He then became abusive so i shut the door on him. He then kept ramming the door with his shoulder. I did call the Police but they said they couldnt do anything because he had gone. My daughters health visitor and doctor know about all this and its all documented somewhere. Thanks for telling me about gingerbread, ill have a look at their website in a bit.
Plowter - The social worker got involved because of my ex's actions. He's really there for my daughter more than me. I have parental responsibilty for my daughter and the social services want her to remain with me. If she were to return to her mothers care, action would be taken to take my girl from her mom. My ex has said that she sent a letter to Child Benefit on Friday but when we've both called asking if this has been received and actioned, they couldnt tell us and didnt know. Bizarre!!! The housing benefits lost my form. The procedure now is for income support to receive the form, stamp it and then forward it on to housing. Apparantly it got lost between income support and housing. Im going into housing tomorrow to fill another form out. I'm going to ask my social worker to call my landlord on monday. Id rather not have any weekend in between so my landlord dont turn up. I can claim child tax benefits while claiming income support, its working credits i cant claim. Ive requested interim payments but this has fallen on deaf ears. Ive also applied for a crisis loan and they have refused saying that income support owe me money and i should have received that by now.
Sense4all - Thanks for your message. It is indeed a very dark time. I just want to enjoy my wonderful little girl but this is taking quite alot of the shine of it all. Its not the start in life i wanted for her. And thank you so much for the links. I will be going through them shortly.
lou - Ive asked about jobseekers but I would be lying that I can seek work and will be available for work which could land me in trouble. Id be claiming falsley. Ill definately be going to CAB soon.
Corby - Thanks for the advice. I'll look into the incapacity benefit. My only worry would be that social services may see that my daughter has two depressed parents, Im not sure how they'd react to that.
Thank you all again. Its restored a bit of my faith!!
Sense4all - Thanks for your message. It is indeed a very dark time. I just want to enjoy my wonderful little girl but this is taking quite alot of the shine of it all. Its not the start in life i wanted for her. And thank you so much for the links. I will be going through them shortly.
lou - Ive asked about jobseekers but I would be lying that I can seek work and will be available for work which could land me in trouble. Id be claiming falsley. Ill definately be going to CAB soon.
Corby - Thanks for the advice. I'll look into the incapacity benefit. My only worry would be that social services may see that my daughter has two depressed parents, Im not sure how they'd react to that.
Thank you all again. Its restored a bit of my faith!!
My advice would be get back to work asap, arrange a child minder using the child care element of the tax credits, your daughter needs alot more later on, you need to get her into a routine now rather than disrupt things later, not sure hoiw early child minders take babies, but you should think further ahead and you could have taklen some paternity leave surely and then arranged things so you did not give up your job, thr wtc and ctc would have seen you ok.
It is tough but keep going. you can tell the jobcentre you are actively looking for work if you can find a child minder, but if u gave up your job i think there is a waiting time for jobseekers but u would get incolme support in stead
It is tough but keep going. you can tell the jobcentre you are actively looking for work if you can find a child minder, but if u gave up your job i think there is a waiting time for jobseekers but u would get incolme support in stead
Get down to your local social services department. Speak to the duty social worker. If your child was put in care they should be able to verify that you have custody of your child so they can confirm the situation with the brew. Once that has been sorted you will be entitled to a crisis loan but only once they know that your claim is kosher and your income support book will be going ahead. Not sure if this number is different in different parts of the country but up here you need to call 08003283834 to get a crisis loan, when it's ready you collect it at your local brew. Good luck, you should also be able to get milk vouchers since you're unable to breast feed.
Heres where I stand now. I went to the Housing department today. Above the housing is the social services office where my social worker is based. I called him down on arrival and we spoke to a housing officer. Yet again, they said that the process could be held up because the lack of child benefit and income support. My social worker then spoke to the assistant manager who made various phone calls. I had to fill in a new claim for housing which is now on the system. I was given a phone number to call someone about my landlord. They are now going to call him, tell him the situation, tell him he will get his rent but it wont be on time. They are also going to speak to him about his actions a month back where he becaime violent.
The social worker is trying to sort me out some hardship money from the social fund and maybe some section 17 money as well. Hes also faxed over supporting letters to income support, child benefit and housing. I spoke to a councillor who put me in touch with home start. They are really there for emotional support but just popped round with some nappys and a tub of milk powder for my little girl which was ever so nice of them.
Lets just see what happens tomorrow
The social worker is trying to sort me out some hardship money from the social fund and maybe some section 17 money as well. Hes also faxed over supporting letters to income support, child benefit and housing. I spoke to a councillor who put me in touch with home start. They are really there for emotional support but just popped round with some nappys and a tub of milk powder for my little girl which was ever so nice of them.
Lets just see what happens tomorrow
You are obviously having a difficult time and it seems that the various authorities involved in your case are just not communicating and talking to each other. . Can I suggest you write down a brief statement of your facts and the names and any reference numbers of the organisations you are trying to deal with, and telephone your local MP's office. He/She will hold a monthly surgery and you might find that if you fix an appointment to see him, his intervention might have the effect of banging a few heads together , highlighting your difficulties and speeding the process along a little.
Just having a neb to see if there was an update. I am so glad that there is a bit of light in the darkness - sometimes that is enough to give you hope things will start to fall into place. The folks at Homestart are very compassionate - I hoped that they would at least make a small gift, I know one of their workers round here is an advocate that the smallest things can make a big difference to people ... you should also feel free to speak to a non govt. agency person - being a parent can be tough, you need to have someone to ask stuff of. ...helps you to feel less isolated too. Love from Sense. X.
PS . Don't forget to check out the Family section for great advice about being a parent!!! Now may not be the time to get rid of the computer, imho.
PS . Don't forget to check out the Family section for great advice about being a parent!!! Now may not be the time to get rid of the computer, imho.
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