Should I Break Up Already With My Boyfriend For Good? #Toxic

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Jessi1996 | 12:35 Sat 04th Sep 2021 | Family
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I met my bf 2 years ago. When we met he told me he lived alone, even told me he had a room for me to come live with him and my son. Come to find out he was living in a house he was working construction on, it was completely empty and his boss gave him the okay to live there temporarily because the mother of his kids had him be placed on house arrest. Okay. I stayed with him. He took me to the keys, he was being a really cool nice guy. He would invite me over each day to go out and enjoy our night. I fell in love with him. Then, he start displaying that he is still talking to the ex. He cheated on me with her. I would call him and she would be in the background yelling “he’s trying to *** me.” He would lie and say no, he’s just seeing his kids and she likes to mess with my head. The woman broke into the house we were staying at one day, stole all my clothes and belongings. He did not try to get a thing back for me. Fast forward his house arrest gets taken off, but it’s put back on another two times because they keep fighting over god knows what, I still don’t understand to this day. But in the middle of all this drama, he became violent to me many times. He hit, kick, beat left me black eyes even when we would fight. He destroyed my car to pieces. I still remained with him because he would blame alcohol and say he lost his mind and that he loves me deeply. His mood when he’s not drunk is so different vs when he is so I believed him and I stayed. Fast forward to now, he has been on house arrest for a year now and stopped communicating finally with the ex. He says he finally feels he learned his lesson and would never talk with her again. But now he got his ankle monitor removed. He started off good, but the woman left her kids all 3 of them under 5 years old with him. And we live in hotels past 4 months, where he hasn’t been the one working to maintain anything. In the beginning he did but he took a break I guess and left me to it once he lost his last job. And I did so, gracefully. But I do from time to time annoy him with my feelings. I tell him I don’t want to be with him anymore because I can’t get over the cheating and having to deal with this woman for ever. Now she is using her kids in her own words for me and him to be stuck with them and *** our lives up. So now this man had her number saved on his phone again last night tells me he thought about texting her but didn’t, he just saved the number. I’m sick of having to deal with this drama again and now it’s worse cause he wants and expects me to now help him be the mother to his 3 kids when I’ve been working so hard this whole time on our relationship, and to hopefully get a home so I can bring my own little 4 year old son to live with me full time. My mom is a blessing and she loves my son to death so she has him for now some days while I work 12 hour shifts so I can maintain this hotel living and hopefully save cash to move into an apartment. So now he got a job, all of a sudden because his kids are stuck with us and he wants me to watch them each morning, until he gets back so I can go to work till 3am and come back home to him and the kids. He is 32 I am 24. I am so overwhelmed just by the gravity of the situation, I don’t want to take care nobodies kids... I don’t think I even want any more of my own. And after admitting this to him, he told me he feels the same now. But at the same time, I haven’t been able to experience a real living relationship ever with a man. Like ever. So at the same time I feel I might want more kids and a little sibling for my own son some day with the right man... also he has taught his 5 year old son in one of our fights to call me a *** to throw me out the house and not let me back in one day. It was a horrible night, he was teaching his son to hit me. It was horrible, he blamed the alcohol the next day and apologized and told his son he was wrong for that. One day he showed up drunk at 12pm, left me and his son in the street becaus


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because we had gotten kicked out of the hotel by 11am and I hadn’t been able to go to work that night to lay the rent in the morning. And he came back crying because his kid told him that the mother put him in another mans truck. He said he was crying because he didn’t want his kids raised or around another man and it hurt him. I don’t process this and explained to him it makes no difference him being with me and his kids vs her being with another man and her kids. But to get to the point, I’ve dealt with a lot of baby mama drama from this guy, literal beatings, and he never has done enough to put food on the table for me or even paid a car payment to the car he wants to drive around all day which is mine, I had to buy a new car thankfully my credit is good and I got a nice car but he doesn’t let me leave. I’ve tried so many times to go and he begs me to come back because how can I leave him stuck with no money no car nothings. So I return. But now these 3 kids, and the absence of love is like killing me. Would I be wrong for just taking off and leaving?

Extra info: he always tells me when I try to leave him that he can’t believe I’m leaving him when he left that woman and his kids (his family) to stay with me. (I didn’t know he had a family when we met) & now especially that he stuck with all his kids he says even more so how can I leave him when he needs me the most. And I don’t mean to sound selfish, but I haven’t stopped working since I was 18 years old... only for a brief like week when I met him we were having so much fun I messed up and had lost my job for missing so many days but I quickly got another one and have been working ever since... I just want to have more time and money to spend on my little son who is mine like 100%. I feel like I’m never going to be able to take my own to Disney world if I take on this responsibility now.. but at the same time it feels wrong to leave his little ones stuck. Also want to add, that I do still love this man, for some reason. But I clearly in my head know I deserve better. I just don’t know or don’t have the courage to do it on my own. I don’t talk to my friends anymore we kinda pushed each other away since I’ve been with this guy.
Yeah - break up with him.
Leave now this will not end well. Consider your child
Leave right now. Think of your little son and what all this is doing to him.In the same position I would have left long ago.
Get out now.
I always give the same advice in these posts :
Can only agree, leave him now and make a better life for you and your son. Things will never get any better for you until you do.
Walk away.

If you stay this will not end well.

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