How it Works0 min ago
Marriage Or Breakup?
Im in relationship since 11 years. We met in college I was 16. Everything was not going smooth and I couldn't realise that I should fight for it. He stopped me going out with friends and only to spend time with him. Soon in one year we also got close physically and the days passed. He would force me to meet and roam with him. He didn't had any interest in studies I tried to motivate him but couldn't help. As days passed he started abusing beating and controlling me. When I started my job after college he would stop me talk to my colleagues on phone and meeting them out was only a dream! I helped him to get car on my name helped him to find job and get settled but he was least interested then after few months he stopped giving emi and my cibil got effected very badly. I was supporting my dad by paying home loan and would rest money on our dates and shopping. He would hit me and treat me like a dog on road. Meanwhile he cheated on me two times he also went in trip once with some women. I finally broke up with him but would blackmail me with our photos posting publicly and then I would go back to him! This became a cycle and finally one day he tried to blackmail on phone which I refused to accept and then he drank some car cleaner and tried to attempt suicide before I do something his family reached hospital and I discussed this with my family. My family asked me to report this to police which I did and here we both agreed not to contact and wrote this on paper as proof. Later I was seriously out of a toxic relationship and had some sort of peace. After few months he came back following me. I ignored him and didn't speak. As the car was on my name and he was not paying emi I spoke to his sister and tried to arrange a meeting. He arrived there and tried to convince me to give chance as he changed I refused and left this continues for more thrre four times I gave him a chance. In these two years I can say he has changed he never hit me or shouted at me. But never allowed me to go out with friends. He was planning to stay with me and marry me, even i had same plan as he changed. The emi still got delayed unless I force to give he would not give. While this all drama happened my friends supported me and involved in the issue while he was physically hurting me. Now one more twist is we belong to different religion amd my parents would not agree for marriage never ever! Now the point is he changed and I don't have any major problem from him we planned our marriage and kids together I told my parents about my wish to marry him and called him to my house but my parents rejected and warned him to stay away and threaten me to stop contacting him. Which i did im not contacting him and told him not to contact me. I love him so much and he loves me too. He is trying to change more and doing his best to find a job. Should I go against my parents to marry him? Should I listen to my parents? Is it cheating on him if I leave him? Im in guilt that im doing this to him. Im really stressed and confused. Please help?
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I'm sorry, but I agree with previous posters. He may not be abusing you at the moment but he is still manipulating you. You have had great support from family and friends so let them help you make the break. I'm afraid there may be a time when he starts physically abusing you again and you may have noone to turn to by then. Be brave.
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