Should Travel To A Different Country Spending Thousand Dollar Just To Get Introduced With Her Parent When She Don't Trust Me With There Numbers?

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hasan9946qq | 23:14 Sat 29th Jun 2019 | Family & Relationships
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We are in a relationship for 4-5 months, she lives 3000 km away in a different country. We believe we are in a serious relationship though we fight a lot. To take the relationship in next step, i asked her to involve each others family. Like, just to acknowledge that are in relationship and to introduce ourself through a video call. Also, sharing one of the family member's number for emergency situation.

But she don't wanna do that. She says she doesn't trust me enough with her parents number or anyone's in family even for emergency situation. She thinks I don't deserve it yet cause I haven't gone to see her for real . So do you guys think I should go to her country, spending thousands of dollars, go through complex visa process to meet the girl i love and get to their home and introduce myself from nowhere as her bf when we don't know each other and can't even speak each other's language? And also, family's view is really important to her like we won't be able to have relationship if they refuse to accept me after we defend our relationship. And in my view, i think we can have basic formal introduction and get there point of view about our relationship first and later we can meet each other when we trust each other better.

Also, financially it will be a challenge to travel there just to get intro.


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can't even speak each other's language?

How do you communicate then ?
Get out now.
And how on earth do you argue if you don’t speak each other’s langauges??
you are in love with the idea of being in love.
You fight a lot even though you are 3000k away.

Find someone closer to home.
Question Author
we can communicate with each other in English but her parent's don't know English
ah.... young love.
Maybe your ( on line ) girlfriend could translate for you then.
There have been examples, completely against all perceived odds against such a thing, of contacts of your kind actually in the end turning out to work as long term marriages, but they are extremely rare.

You say the two of you are in love yet you don't know each other - that sounds like a complete contradiction. Realistically, nobody can advise you on your question unless it is to point you in the direction of improving the odds, as some already have done: Switch to a simpler and more promising/realistic scene, what you describe looks to us more ordinary folk as hopeless fantasy.
10,000 of us on here could all say you are right and she is wrong and it wouldn't make the slightest bit of difference. Basically she has set out her position and its up to you to take it or leave it.
I am also in a LDR with someone in another country so most of our communication is via video chat. We have been dating nearly 4 years and we are comfortable and confident in our relationship with each other.

Your situation concerns me though. Whilst I appreciate that seeing each other in person is difficult because of distance, the fact that you fight a lot is a worry. The fact that she does not trust you with telephone numbers is also a worry and her reasons for it. I am sorry to say that I do not think your relationship is going to work as she does not seem forthcoming with the basics which makes me suspicious. In my opinion, I think you should cut your losses now before you spend a considerable amount of money to visit her only to find out she isnt who you thought she was.
Wake up and smell the coffee.

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