Am I Being Unreasonable

[Katieedwards2312]

Am i being unreasonable?

So i found out today that my husbands younger brother cheated on his girlfriend over the weekend. My husband works with his brother and they decided to go down the pub after work. Apparently his brother met this girl. He went back to her place and so on..... only my husband did not tell me this. This was apparently to spare my feelings towards his brother. However my husband got in after i went to bed (the norm on a lads night out) when i asked where he got too he said he went back to a friends and left his brother there because he was done for the night and wanted to come home, so left him. My husbands mum called me in the morning and told me his brother didnt get back until 9am......now i didnt think to much of this until MY mum (of all people) told me my husbands brother apparently had met this girl.... she found out through my brother inlaw who clearly thought my husband had already shared this info with me???? and had also been told this info by my husband????? I am so angry that i have found out like this.......but what hurts the most is he lied to me about coming home and leaving his brother at a friends.....am i being completely unreasonable by being angry??? He seems to think that my anger is a complete over reaction. I truly feel hurt by being lied to and how i believed him....i trusted him implicitly; but i cant help but feel this trust has been misplaced.....what else has he lied to me abou

[pastafreak]

Spath...it probably wasn't discussed because it's really not anyone's business. It becomes gossip otherwise. Besides, did the husband KNOW that the BIL slept with the friend? Possibly not when he left them. So where is the lying or hiding of information?

[Prudie]

I still can't fathom what you're upset about "He could of just said he went to a friends...that would of satisfied??? He went out of his way to tell me he left his brother at his friends".
As for him not telling you about what his brother got up to, many men will stick up for each other and I'm not sure why you needed to know before the rest of the family. You are reading too much into it all.

[Katieedwards2312]

Well this is what i thought??? Im not the sort of person to go back and say anything and he knows this.....we have been together many many many years??? But hey if he felt he couldn't tell me thats fine....its the lie that accompanied the situation.

[pastafreak]

ITS NOT A LIE!!
Sorry for shouting...

[Katieedwards2312]

I couldnt be any less interested in what his brother got up to????

[ummmm]

Have you never told a lie or with held the full truth?

[Baldric]

Pasta
See posts at 11:18 and 11:20

[Prudie]

Please say what the lie was as I have genuinely misunderstood

[Katieedwards2312]

HE DID LIE!!!! he told me he left his brother at a friends house (my husbands friend, therefore he named a friend and made out his brother spent the evening their....

[Prudie]

So what is the lie - did he not leave his brother at this friend's?

[ummmm]

So his brother wasn't actually at the friends he claimed?

[ummmm]

If I'm understanding it....he said his brother was at a friends when really he'd gone off with a woman?

[Sqad]

Your concerns are well founded Katie.
The rules of philandering, when caught:
1) Lie
2) Lie again
If the above fails
3) Plead insanity.

I think, that you believe, that your husband chested on you and you have every right to be "miffed."

[Katieedwards2312]

Yeah ive told white lies to spare his feelings...like the time he decided to buy a jacket i hated...but hey he liked it, it made him happy.....i have never fabricated a lie to cover up the truth NO

[ummmm]

Sqad....you're confusing things... :-)

[Old_Geezer]

You are now saying that a particular friend was named. Ok be a little miffed. But it was still minor given the desire to not spread rumour and make a fuss out of something that was hopefully to be kept quiet.

[pastafreak]

I think I'd call it an omission rather than a lie. As I understand it, he said "a friend" without specifying which or whose friend. Or did he say friend "A"...when it was actually friend "B" ?