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lizzydrippin | 18:26 Tue 29th Nov 2016 | Parenting
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My daughter in law had a 5 day trip to NY booked and paid for before she even got pregnant (it's an annual trip she goes on with a girlfriend). Up until she had the baby (her first) she thought she'd be quite happy to go but of course now he is here she''s getting cold feet about leaving him. He'll be in good hands with his Dad and Grandma but Mum's just not sure she can part with him. Would you encourage her to go or encourage her to leave it for this year?. I have mixed feelings


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Avatar Image can't Eddie but it makes being away from your child easier. I couldn't have left mine at that age as I breastfed but I certainly wouldn't judge a mother for going on a trip away that has been booked and paid for.
20:31 Tue 29th Nov 2016
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Baby's 7 weeks old btw...
I can understand her not wanting to leave him, gentle encouragement to her but then let her make her own decision.
I wouldn't leave a baby at that age, but as advised, it has to be the mother's choice.

I would advise her that if she is anything less than one hundred per cent certain that she will be alright without him - of course he will be fine - then she should defer her trip.
I wouldn't try tp persuade her one way or the other. It's a very personal decision and we're all very different.
Personally I would not get involved at all. Some women are happy to leave them my SIL did but my BF couldn't.
I wouldn't give my opinion either way. I'd just back her decision.
I agree....totally her decision.
I think you've answered your own question
You know deep down you want to be with your baby. Wait til next year
It will soon come round.
Agree with others here. It has to be her decision.
I also asked my wife this question, as I think it has to be the mothers personal choice of whether she feels comfortable leaving a 7 week old baby with relatives while she goes off for her annual trip to NY.

In my opinion, and as she goes every year, it wouldn't be disastrous to miss it for one year and put the baby first.....7 weeks is very young and the mother would be probably worried about him in the time away......
NY ....not like it's a hour away is it?

Mrs bear's opinion....."there's always next year, isn't there?".....or she said defer it to when baby is a little older....say 6 months and go around Easter.

All personal choice of how she feels. Good luck x
Her first priority is to the child. Once you become a Mother (or a Father ) your priorities change to those of the child. Days as a single girl are now in the past her future is as the mother of a child. Great to have friends but your own child comes before the interests of the friends you had when single.
Please note I AM NOT !! saying the child will suffer in any way , he / she will be happy, loved and well cared for. It is a question of how your responsibility shifts to your child / children once you become a parent.
I think 7 weeks is a little young to be left. But that is my personal opinion and I don't think I could do it.
Also on a personal level, I don't see how she could go off on holiday and not constantly worry about how the baby is doing. I would think she would not enjoy the holiday for worry about leaving the child.
The first year of a new baby's life is 'special' and 'unrepeatable' . She has had and will have more holidays, but she can never live the first year of her life with a baby again.
Every year is unrepeatable!!

We live in a different age now with the internet.
The Internet can't put the child in her arms while she is away in New York Ummmm !
is the baby still drinking person juice? can't Eddie but it makes being away from your child easier.

I couldn't have left mine at that age as I breastfed but I certainly wouldn't judge a mother for going on a trip away that has been booked and paid for.
Question Author
Thanks so much everyone for your feedback, like most of you have pointed out it has to be a decision that Mum makes for herself, obviously, and I wouldnt attempt to influence her decision either way. I simply wanted to pass on some food for thought as she's spent the last week going backwards and forwards from going on the trip to deferring. My personal feelings about it is that I wouldn't be able to do it and I think if she does decide to go she'll be miserable and wishing she was home with her boy. No doubt that baby will be fine as his Dad has been hands on with him since birth, he'll be taking time off work to take care of him full time and he's used to doing night feeds etc....and Grandma will also be on hand too. No, Mum's not breastfeeding, not from choice but she's on particularly hefty painkillers for a long term illness which prevents her from feeding baby herself. At the moment it seems she is going to NY on Saturday but I wouldn't be surprised if that doesn't change at the last minute. Time will tell.....

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