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3 Year Old Son Voluntarily Mentions What He Saw Almost Every Day

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crazygirly38 | 07:26 Sun 12th Jun 2016 | Parenting
17 Answers
my 3 year old son recently saw his father physically attack me and mentions it almost every day what can i do to help my little boy?

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Change the subject. Not many people remember being 3.
Leave your husband. If he's attacked you once, he will do it again.
Get your son out of that situation for his peace of mind.
Question Author
I'm no longer with him we have been split for about 2 n half years. He attacked me a couple if months ago and denied it to the police. My 3 year ok son has mentioned what he saw to my parents (his grandma and grandad). My son has mentioned it to my friend and voluntarily told the social worker.
He shouldn't be allowed to get away with it. Brave man beating up a woman. Coward no doubt if it was a man.
I doubt you can stop him mentioning it to others. Just don't make a big deal of it and let it pass. He must eventually drop thinking about it and it gets put into the past.
Question Author
I am due to attend mediation as instructed by my ex partner via a solicitor. About 2 months ago my ex partner physically attacked me in full view of our little boy who recently turned 3 years old. He has mentioned voluntarily "daddy hit mummy" he has mentioned this to my parents (his grandparents and also demonstrated actions of what he saw his daddy do to me), he has mentioned this to the social worker and a friend of mine.

Where do i stand as regards to my ex partner seeing our son taking into account that our son seems to be somewhat scarred from this incident in which my ex partner denied to the police when he was arrested.
Your ex could be denied access to your son if you can convince the authorities that your son is frightened of him. He could also have an order against him contacting you in any way.
Are you planning to stop your partner from seeing your son?
Just because he saw an assault on you that doesnt mean he shouldn't be able to see his father.
The court is interested in the child and his rights to see both parents. unless the child is likely to be harmed.
Obviously that harm can be mental as well as physical but there are ways of allowing the father/child relationship without the father and mother coming into contact.
Some mothers try to spite the father in these situations and that is not always in the best interests of the child.
Question Author
I'm the past when our son has been in his fathers care, Blake has told me that he has been bitten by the family dog (a Staffordshire bull terrier) that is known to all that the dog is nasty. His father has let Blake clear up dog mess up on the back garden. I have collected Blake on a Sunday only to be told by his father to collect Blake from the pub and when I arrived at the pub, I couldn't find David (Blake's father) as the pub was busy as it always is. I eventually found David sat at a table with 3 empty pint pots and 1 full one. I asked David where Blake was and his reply was "he is in the kids area somewhere". From where David was sat was far from where Blake was playing. Blake was nearly 2 n half years old when he was left alone in the child's area.
A day is quite a long time for a three year old. He's just concerned.
Question Author
Marshwarble....have you actually read what you have attempted a reply to?
Do you have any real evidence about your partners behaviour with your son or pictures of the dog bite etc.
The courts are so used to couples fighting in this way and using the child as part of the battle that you may have a difficulty in proving your side of the story.
I assume here that he will deny everything.
His background will be investigated to see if there is any previous history that might indicate that he is an unfit person etc etc but proving it is the key.
I assume you will be aware of the recent Minnock case where the child was taken away from the mother.
Question Author
Minnock case? No what happened or do you have a link to this case?
I mentioned the minnock case because it is an extreme version of parents not acting in the best interests of the child.
Ms minnock was determined not to allow her son to see his father and the press became involved when she ran away because she would not comply with court orders regarding access.
here's a link with PART of the story.
https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2015/jun/24/rebecca-minnock-voices-fears-of-emotional-impact-on-son-if-she-is-jailed

remember this is an extreme case but it chows the courts are no longer tolerating either parent who doesn't put the child's interest first.

If you accept that the court wants children to have access to both parents and that is the child's right then maybe you can approach your mediation session with a different frame of mind.
Put your son first but if you strongly believe that he is in real danger from his father then gather evidence as best you can.
The dog issue can be resolved because the court would just make an order that he is not allowed in the same location as your son - every other issue may have a solution & this might include parenting education and anger management for your partner.
The contact with his father wont be prevented unless there is a real danger to your son.
Yes, why did it sound pat? I'm not an expert.

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