Im Done

[nailit]

Wouldnt give McMillan a bent washer after how they have humilitated my mum and left her in so much pain.
Even had nurses taking off their PPE to give her a bed bath, What The Funicular?
Denied her pain relief. The GP had to overide them on that one.
The list can go on forever...

Hope I die of anything but cancer if thats the care that I can I can look forward to.

[Bobbisox1]

Nailit I'm truly sorry for you reading this

[nailit]

Rather Gas myself Than go through what McMillan are putting my mum through....

[nailit]

Unless you have been in this position, no one would believe you.

[Mozz71]

Not much I can say Nails. In the nicest possible way, I hope your Mum's suffering ends soon.

[bobbinwales]

Am maybe missing the back storey. Sounds very disturbing. What's wrong with a bed bath, nailit, are you saying its not what she needs she needs pain relief and whats the pain relief there refusing to give her??

[Mamyalynne]

Saddened to read of your experiences with Macmillan, I have no experience of care from them.

The only help I had was with District Nurses administering meds I was not allowed to, I coped myself otherwise.

I would urge you to give them feedback on how you feel when you can think clearly.

[-SharonA-]

Nailit, I believe you. When my mum had cancer over 15 years ago, she begged me to keep them away from her. She reckoned they were not sympathetic at all. She did not like them.

[pastafreak]

I'm so sorry to read this nailit...this is so wrong at a time when you want to see that your mum's suffering is being eased.
Please keep a diary of what is happening...or not. You may want it later.9

[bobbinwales]

A do share your concerns, with mine my impression in a nursing home sadly was she was just a unit a commodity not a person, we found her left wearing no clothes when we called in unexpected, and when they moved her she was just pushed over on the bed like a bag of sand. There are am sure many loving carers who start off wanting to care deeply but a think there so busy and hardend by the job that some, maybe alot, see their residents/patients as an object

[Tilly2]

Why were they withholding her pain relief?

[nailit]

//Why were they withholding her pain relief?//

Beats the crap out of me Tills,
A McMillan nurse actually said that its a lot of paperwork???
GP (and a district nurse) said that she needs it and she is now on it.

[Mozz71]

I don't know how you held your anger in Nails, I think I'd have gone ballistic.

[nailit]

//I don't know how you held your anger in Nails, I think I'd have gone ballistic.//
Mozz, my sister is my primary carer for my mum at the moment (im working in the week)
Its a ball ache trying to care for her.
I swear to god tho that if I was there when these daft tw*ts came out that I would blow my top...

She is just left in agony....

[ummmm]

It's pot luck with carers, sad to say. They were brilliant with my dad but someone was always with him. Obviously that's not possible for many many families.

[jourdain2]

We have had nothing but praise for McMillan nurses in the 2 or 3 cases we have known. OH's daughter - died aged 50, 9 years ago - would not have been able to die peacefully at home without them. Something seems to have gone badly wrong here.

I don't see a problem really with the nurses removing their PPE to give a bed bath. Your mum may have felt happier being able to see faces for such an intimate job and, very sorry to say this, Nailit, her time is limited anyway.

The pain relief is hugely different. No-one, no-one should die suffering from unnecessary pain . 'All pain is unnecessary' was the motto of our French hospital. The G.P. seems to be on the ball - go directly to him/her.

I can understand, and we can all share, your apprehensions. I have few illusions about the generality of the NHS these days. Some bits are excellent - but this crisis has frightened most of us I suspect. It's scared me and shattered the few veils of illusion I had left.

[marval]

I am sorry Nailit for what your Mum and you are all going through.

I have no experience of the McMillan nurses, but I would expect better.

My thoughts and prayers are with you all.

[Cloverjo]

I’m sorry to read that Nailit.
I can’t remember whether it was MacMillan or Marie Curie who looked after my mum for one night when she had cancer.
Whoever it was they were awful.
Clacking around in heels and turning the telly up so loud my mum couldn’t sleep. Those were the least of the problems.

[Rosie29]

I'm so very sorry Nailit - what a dreadful time for you both - I can't say anything to add to what has already been said except that I am thinking of you x

[nailit]

My sister....my mums mane carer....was due to have a knee replacement at the start of lockdown, she can hardly stand on it now.
But she spends money on a Taxi down to my mums everyday and try's to get mum onto the toilet etc because otherwise my mum will soil herself while waiting for ''care'' to come in.
(Down for a breakfast visit which can be anything up until 11 oclock)
What a joke....

[naomi24]

It’s the hardest time, nailit, and you have my sincere sympathy. I really don’t understand why your mum is suffering unnecessarily but personal care like washing is not usually carried out by Macmillan nurses. Others are allocated to those tasks. Macmillan nurses are specialists and having had considerable help and support from them I honestly can’t fault them.