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Nonsense Poems

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AB Editor | 13:28 Thu 20th Jun 2013 | Arts & Literature
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What's your favourite nonsense poem? I like the Jabberwocky.

`Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.


"Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!"

He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the manxome foe he sought --
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.

And, as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!

One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.

"And, has thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!'
He chortled in his joy.

`Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

I wondered, besides Caroll, who is a good source of Nonsense Poems? I also wondered if there is a well known collection of English nonsense poems for kids?
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I don't know if it's a nonsense poem or not, but it's one I've loved for years. Although, I didn't know there was a lot more to it than this... One fine day in the middle of the night Two dead boys got up to fight Back to back they faced each other Drew their swords and shot each other One was blind and the other couldn't see So they chose a dummy for a referee A blind man...
13:44 Thu 20th Jun 2013
Edward Lear? The Owl & the Pussycat is pretty bonkers
Edward Lear, though he specialised in limericks and they weren't that great by modern standards because the first and last lines ended in the same words.

I don't suppose The Waste Land counts.
Spike Milligan wrote brilliant nonesense. I have abook of funny poems upstairs. I'll go and get it.
There is quite a lot of nonsense prose on AB
Mr BM commented on the geese on the lake the other day with the phrase "goosy goosy gander", so I recited the full nursery rhyme. He thought I had lost it.

Goosey goosey gander,
Whither shall I wander?
Upstairs and downstairs
And in my lady's chamber.
There I met an old man
Who wouldn't say his prayers,
So I took him by his left leg
And threw him down the stairs
The pobble who had no toes?
I like this one,

On the Ning Nang Nong
Where the Cows go Bong!
And the monkeys all say BOO!
There's a Nong Nang Ning
Where the trees go Ping!
And the tea pots jibber jabber joo.
On the Nong Ning Nang
All the mice go Clang
And you just can't catch 'em when they do!
So its Ning Nang Nong
Cows go Bong!
Nong Nang Ning
Trees go ping
Nong Ning Nang
The mice go Clang
What a noisy place to belong
Is the Ning Nang Ning Nang Nong!
THE TROUBLE WITH GERANIUMS

The trouble with geraniums
is that they’re much too red!
The trouble with my toast is that
it’s far too full of bread.

The trouble with a diamond
is that it’s much too bright.
The same applies to fish and stars
and the electric light.

The troubles with the stars I see
lies in the way they fly.
The trouble with myself is all
self-centred in the eye.

The trouble with my looking-glass
is that it shows me, me;
there’s trouble in all sorts of things
where it should never be.


Mervyn Peake
Some Experts Say...

Back in 16th century Europe, most people were busy either fighting off plagues or killing off Catholics. Priests especially were in high demand as there was a reward for the Protestant who was able to find and execute one.

The method of execution was often tying him by the legs and throwing him down a flight of stairs (thus the last line in the rhyme). Unless he would begin to say his prayers in English rather than Latin, he would bounce down the steps faster than your childhood Slinky. If he did give in, he was spared by--oh wait, no. They threw him down the stairs regardless.

So that's all well and good, but what the hell does the phrase "Goosey Goosey Gander" have to do with anything?

Well, it's thought that "Goosey" is referencing an old slang term "goose" which was a nice but roundabout way of saying "voluptuous lady of the night" which in turn is a euphemism for "goddamn dirty hooker." In fact, the term "goose bumps" was originally slang for the red bumps caused by venereal diseases.

nicked from http://www.cracked.com/article_16576_the-disturbing-origins-5-common-nursery-rhymes.html
^nonsense.
Mamya, that last verse doesn't sound much like nonsense to me. I fully relate to the looking glass problem!
I usually detest poetry, in my mind it's all utter nonsense anyway, however I do have a favourite daft one, just for its simplicity- it's wonderful.

Algy met a bear
A bear met Algy
The bear was bulgy
The bulge was Algy
The Cow Poem


The cow mainly moos as she chooses to moo
and she chooses to moo as she chooses.
She furthermore chews as she chooses to chew
and she chooses to chew as she muses.
If she chooses to moo she may moo to amuse
or may moo just to moo as she chooses.
If she chooses to chew she may moo as she chews
or may chew just to chew as she muses.

Jack Pretlusky
Question Author
"I don't suppose The Waste Land counts."

It's one of my favourites - I think that might be a subjective "nonsense" :)

Thanks for your submissions - Lear is quite correct, I did think of the owl and the pussycat.

What about collections of nonsense verse?
It's not nonsense, but when I had secretaries I used to dictate little rhymes half way through the tape to make them laugh. My favourite was

Spider spider on the wall
Ain't you got no brains at all
Can't you see the wall's been plastered
Now you're stuck you silly ******
Legal secretaries barmaid - My daughter had one of them type "we feel we have been backed into a coroner". Sorry Ab Editor - I digress.
Does anyone know 'the pobble who had no toes? Could someone print it if they do. I think I remember it from school.
I don't know if it's a nonsense poem or not, but it's one I've loved for years. Although, I didn't know there was a lot more to it than this...

One fine day in the middle of the night
Two dead boys got up to fight
Back to back they faced each other
Drew their swords and shot each other

One was blind and the other couldn't see
So they chose a dummy for a referee
A blind man went to see fair play
A dumb man went to shout "hooray!"

A paralyzed donkey passing by
Kicked the blind man in the eye
Knocked him through a 9 inch wall
Into a dry ditch and drowned them all

A deaf policeman heard the noise
And came to arrest the 2 dead boys
If you don't believe this story's true
Ask the blind man, he saw it, too!
The Kingfisher Book of Comic Verse.
First publihed 1986
I still have my copy

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