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McMouse

1401 to 1420 of 1489

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McMouse
Last month, National University of Lesotho scientists released the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. Men should take a concerned look at their beer...
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McMouse
At a nursing home a group of OAP's were sitting around talking about all their ailments. "My arms have become so weak I can hardly lift this cup of coffee," said one. "Yes, I know," said another. "My...
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McMouse
I want to die like my grandfather, who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like the passengers in his car.
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McMouse
Keep this philosophy in mind the next time you either hear or are about to repeat a rumour. In ancient Greece (469 - 399 BC), Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom. One day the great philosopher...
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McMouse
Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party After several drinks, one of the men had to use the rest room. Those who remained talked about their kids. The first guy said,...
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McMouse
(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up. (2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five...
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McMouse
Teenage girl went to her GP for a check-up. When sounding her chest he said "Big breaths". She replied "and I'm only thixteen"
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McMouse
Two Asian heroin addicts have injected themselves with curry powder by mistake - both are intensive care. One has a dodgy tikka and the other one is in a korma.
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McMouse
News just in. Police in London have found a bomb outside a Mosque. They've told the public not to panic as they've managed to push it inside.
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McMouse
'Are there too many immigrants in Britain?' > 21% Said: Yes > 17% Said: No > 62% Said: عهد الأمن...
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McMouse
A bloke applies for a job with the Victoria police, Inspector says "These are the best qualifications I've ever seen. Just one further test : Take this gun, go out, and shoot 6 Abo's, 6 Muslim's & a...
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McMouse
A man boarded plane with 6 kids. After they got settled in their seats a woman sitting across the aisle from him leaned over to him and asked, 'Are all of those kids yours?' He replied, 'No. I work...
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McMouse
John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life!, between the legs of me wife!" That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night! He went home and...
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McMouse
Two hillbillies walk into a bar. While having a shot of whisky, they talk about their moonshine operation. Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough. And, after a...
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McMouse
BEST LAWYER STORY OF THE YEAR, DECADE AND PROBABLY THE CENTURY. A Charlotte, NC lawyer purchased a box of very rare and expensive cigars, and then insured them against fire, among other things. Within...
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McMouse
A man and a woman are sitting beside each other in the first class section of the plane. The woman sneezes, takes a tissue, gently wipes her nose and shudders quite violently in her seat. The man...
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McMouse
A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool. After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly,...
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McMouse
Three old guys are out walking. First one says, 'Windy, isn't it?' Second one says, 'No, it's Thursday!' Third one says, 'So am I. Let's go get a beer.'
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McMouse
An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen. The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, 'Last night we went out to a...
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McMouse
A Scotsman phones a dentist to enquire about the cost for a tooth extraction. "?85 for an extraction, sir" the dentist replied. "?85!!! Huv ye no'got anythin' cheaper?" "That's the normal charge,"...

1401 to 1420 of 1489

First Previous 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 Next Last