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McMouse
The Archbishop of Canterbury and The Royal Commission for Political Correctness announced today that the climate in the UK should no longer be referred to as English Weather. Rather than offend a...
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McMouse
A lawyer boarded a Jetstar flight in Perth, with a box of frozen crabs and asked a blonde stewardess to take care of them for him. She took the box and promised to put it in the crew's refrigerator....
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McMouse
Dear Benefits Office Manager My name is Mohammed Reza and I live in Birmingham , and I would like to present before you the following story. Many years ago, I married a widow out of love who had an...
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McMouse
A rural couple had made sacrifices to save money to send their only son to college. Once there, he began to let his hair grow long, plus sideburns, a mustache, and a goatee. When his hair was...
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McMouse
Hung Chow calls his work and says "Hey, I no come wok today, I really sick. Got headache, stomach ache and legs hurt, I no come wok". The boss says "You know something, Hung Chow, I really need you...
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McMouse
A father put his 3 year old daughter to bed, told her a story and listened to her prayers which ended by saying, "God bless Mummy, God bless Daddy, God bless Grandma and good-bye Grandpa." The father...
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McMouse
A Banker parks his brand new Porsche in front of the office to show it off to his colleagues. As he's getting out of the car, a lorry comes speeding along too close to the kerb and takes off the door...
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McMouse
Text of a letter from a kid from Eromanga to Mum and Dad. (For Those of you not in the know, Eromanga is a small town, west of Quilpie in the far south west of Queensland ) Dear Mum & Dad, I am well....
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McMouse
with Marmite soldiers and celery salt. My perfect start to the day. What's yours?
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McMouse
A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed. She puts on her dressing gown and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot...
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McMouse
Council has introduced a new re-cycling regime with 5 difference bins. I've just about fathomed out what does where, but not without casualties. 1. Turned ankle stamping on beer cans which have to be...
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McMouse
I tried a dozen oysters last year. They were useless, only five worked.
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McMouse
I know a politician whose name is Jim, I really love throwing tomatoes at him, Tomatoes are soft and don't hurt the skin, But these f***ers do, 'cos they're still in the tin...
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McMouse
Was quite a surprise.
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McMouse
Norman, an old retired sailor, puts on his old uniform and heads for the docks once more, for old times sake and some hot sex. He engages a lovely prostitute and takes her up to a room. He's soon...
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McMouse
Alan and Sandra lived on a cove at Gull Lake Alberta. It was early winter and the lower portion of the cove had frozen over. Alan asked Sandra if she would walk across the frozen part of the cove to...
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McMouse
An old man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the movie theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the old man, "Sorry sir, but you're only allowed one seat." The old man...
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McMouse
I was at my bank today and there was a short queue. There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady who was trying to exchange yen for pounds. It was obvious she was very irritated . . . She...
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The Mexican maid asked for a pay increase. The wife was very upset about this and decided to talk to her about the raise. She asked, “Now Maria, why do you want a pay increase?" ”Maria: “Well,...
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Mrs McM just uttered the fateful words "I agree with you"...

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