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The Centipede

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retrocop | 10:52 Sat 29th Aug 2015 | Jokes
12 Answers
The Centipede

















A single guy decided life would be more fun




if he had a pet.

















So he went to the pet store




and told the owner




that he wanted to buy an unusual pet.

















After some discussion,




he finally bought a talking centipede,




(100-legged bug),




which came in a little white box




to use for his house.

















He took the box back home,




found a good spot for the box,




and decided he would start off




by taking his new pet




to church with him.

















So he asked the centipede in the box

"Would you like to go




to church with me today?




We will have a good time."

















But there was no answer �




from his new pet.

















This bothered him a bit,




but he waited a few minutes




and then asked again,




"How about going




to church with me




and receive blessings?"

















But again,




there was no answer




from his new friend and pet.




So he waited




a few minutes more,




thinking about the situation.

















The guy decided




to invite the centipede




one last time.

















This time he




put his face up against




the centipede's house and shouted,








"Hey, in there!




Would you like to go �




to




church with me �




and learn about God?"








.....



























YOU ARE GOING TO LOVE THIS ......

















This time, �




a little voice




came out of the box ,











"I heard you the first time!




I'm putting my shoes on!"






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Thats a very old joke. I heard that one when I was still at school.
Question Author
Wow. Impressive. A memory that goes back nearly 100 years!! :-)
Im not 100 years old yet, but I do remember being told this when I was at senior school, like the one
What did the earwig say when he fell of the table?
Ear-wiggo.
What goes 99 thump? A centipede with a wooden leg.
Not only a very old joke but it took . . . . . . . . . . .. a . . . . . . . . . . . . long . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . .. . . . . . .. . . . .. . . . . . .. time. . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . to . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . .. . . . . tell. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . it.
It's a good job that it was a trendy centipede imagine if it wore socks too!
Some of the joke made no sense at all though...




"Would you like to go




to church with me today?




We will have a good time."



eh...?
last time i heard it he was a footballer and was still putting his boots on at half time
Scored lots of goals the lad did though, Ael

(what a feking annoying thread to return to)
I'm with "you" all the way -Talbot-. ^ . . Bye! . . . for now.
Question Author
Talbot
I do apologise to all.
Having read through a lot of mind numbing guff from our resident Cut and paste boremonger on the News section I find this style of posting a short joke quite similar. It must be contagious. :-(
My mouse had to put its trainers on to run between the lines.

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The Centipede

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