Facebook - Eeek!

[237SJ]

I joined Facebook because there is a history group for my childhood village and I wanted to join which I did. I`m not really interested in doing the whole 'friends' thing. I have just received a friend request (funilly enough, it`s from someone who told my mum that he always had a crush on me). Anyway, do I accept and start the whole 'friends' thing or ignore/decline or whatever it is you do and risk insulting him?

[Mamyalynne]

Imagine you bumped into him on the street - would you want to chat and keep in touch?

Let that be your guide.

[Retrochic]

Word of warning -he may not have actually sent the friends request -FB have a habit of sending you friends requests or suggestions, it happened to me recently . Mamylynnes suggestion is a good one.

[237SJ]

It`s not really about him personally - it`s just that if I accept his request, that will start the floodgates and will have to do the 'friends thing' so I don`t know whether to go for it and just succumb to being on Facebook or tell him that I`m not interested in all of that. Can you reply to someone and tell them that?

[Mamyalynne]

If you don't really want to do the 'Friends' thing, just decline - it's not a snub as such.

[bookbinder]

Would it really bother you if you decline the 'let's be friends' approach?
As you haven't thought about this person, nor been in touch, it shouldn't be difficult to click on 'no', or whatever you have to do. Would he be insulted? Probably not. It's only Facebook, after all.

[Fusion5]

Like Retro says, the requests not always come direct from friend. This seems to be a trend on FB lately.

[Robinia]

I agree with mamya...and yes, you can send him a private message on his fb page.

[237SJ]

If I decline though, he might take it personally when what I really want to say is that I don`t just not want him as a friend, I don`t want anyone as a friend.

[Fusion5]

Then just message him and explain that.

[237SJ]

Thanks - I will message him. I wasn`t sure if there was a facility to do that.

[Retrochic]

237SJ send him a private message:
Hi! Thanks for sending me a FB friend request its so nice to hear from you! I'm really only using FB for work so not really into these FB friends but hey here's my private email addy (or mobile number) would love to get together over coffee sometime to catch up.
He'll either ignore you or answer -problem solved!

[237SJ]

LOL - I`ve got no intention of getting together with him over coffee. He`s married anyway. I think it`s just that we were a small village and we all knew each other and he probably just thinks it would be nice to have another village kid as a friend.

[wolf63]

My brother refused to be my 'friend' on Facebook. What's he got to hide?


:-)

[RandyMarsh]

agree and go buy new undies

[Mamyalynne]

My daughter kicked me off her friends list! Claimed she got over enthusiastic during a clear out - yeah.

[237SJ]

"agree and go buy new undies" Actually, I`m off to the local dump right now - that`s as romantic as it gets around here.

[Retrochic]

So what he's married -its not an invitation into your bed its an invite for a coffee lol!

[237SJ]

Retro - see that`s the thing. I don`t want to meet him for a coffee. In fact, I don`t want to meet him at all which is why I don`t do Facebook. My friends are my friends. They are the people I see, speak to, were here for me at my Mum`s funeral, etc etc. If I wanted to keep in touch with people from my childhood, school etc then I would have. If we didn`t keep in touch, then there is a reason why and I don`t see the point in sharing my life with them on the internet. I love our village history group because of all the old photos and stories that people post but it`s purely for nostalgia.

[ummmm]

Being friends with someone doesn't mean you have to meet up or talk on a daily basis.

[EDDIE51]

Easy, just tell him you are only on FB for the history group.