As I have mentioned on here a few times one of my hobbies is studying human sexuality. At the moment I have a particular interest in sex between people with learning difficulties/mental health problems. I think it's a real taboo subject and few enjoy discussing it.
I interviewed an experienced manager in the care industry. She talked about how staff members get in trouble even for mentioning the subject, and how people with learning difficulties are discouraged from buying porn, masturbating or even having a romantic interest. Apparently 'no-one' wants the learning problems passed on genetically to the off-spring.
Occassionally people in care will be found to be 'having it off' and they are immediately marched off to the Doctor's for compulsory birth control. (the females that is).
For me the issue is that a person with learning difficulties/mental health problems may be emotionally mature enough to cope with sex, but not have the ability to handle parenthood without substantial support. This depends on the severity of their problems I suppose, and is doubly true if the baby has special needs.
In my humble one, our legal/ethical system generally does not cope well with people in these groups. The idea of having adult rights and responsibilities at 16 or 18 doesn't work if someone has a significantly lower mental capacity.
What does everyone think are the moral questions raised here and what if anything is a good solution ?
Mani Hussain Fri 22/08/08 21:03
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I don't know who you have been talking to but your view is very different from mine.
There is NO compulsory birth control except in very exceptional circumstances where a judge has made such an order; there are dating ages for such people (Mencap is involved with some of them); the FPA have been campaigning for the rights of those with special needs to have a full and active sex life; and 'responsible masturbation' is taught where necessary - this means teaching people that masturbation is a private matter not to be done where they can be seen. Like picking your nose.
Some parents have applied to the court to have their daughters sterilised because they don't believe they have the mental capacity to deal with pregnancy and childbirth, but this is rarely granted in the UK.
So, I think you have been led up the garden path by your interviewee. Maybe he or she thought your interest to be salacious.
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Well yes when i read this post , i did think his interest was salacious. and what a strange hobby, if you can call it that
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Question Author
Thanks Ethel thats interesting, i will have to dig deeper.
The Family Planning Association have recently launched a campaign, along with information packd for people with learning disabilities re. the right to be able to consider and chose sexual relationships. I have one of the packs and it really is very good stuff.
The main thrust is that people with learning disabilities often are denied opportunities to engage in sexual relationship and frequently are not given information to be able to make a choice. A survey attatched to campaign which can be found here highlights that many people with mild to moderate learning disabilities want to be informed and be able to make the choices for themselves.
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I know a married couple (in their 40s/50s) who are both quite severly handicapped and with low mental ages.
They live in a care home and have their own suite to live as husband and wife. The woman was sterilised many years ago - not because of the relationship, but maybe just in case she did have sexual relations - and they have been counselled and encouraged in living a normal married life including a sexual relationship.
They adore each other and are a delight to be around. I do not think them having children would be a positive thing though, because I generally beleve they would not be able to cope, also it would be quite likely that any children would be quite severely impaired.
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Mani, you certainly have some very odd interests.
Incidentally, what happened to that book you were writing?
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I used to teach a girl (and many of her peers) with learning disabilities.
It gave us both immense pleasure when we bumped into each other eight years after she'd left school and she very proudly introduced me to her husband. They had a rented home and both had jobs, and she told me that they'd like to have children eventually but that she didn't feel ready just yet.
I knew this girl's parents very well and I know that if and when she does decide to have children, she'll be extremely well supported and will be a first rate mother.
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Question Author
Naomi, my book 'from Sinister to Minister, my story' is finished and I am now trying to get it published. I am now planning my second book 'Sexual Observations'.
Fadgill what do you find strange about studying human behaviour?
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Sorry Mani, I feel the need to interject here.
I don't see why trying to understand this subject should be weird or perverse. The information that Mani is trying to find could be pertinent to, for instance, counsellors and psychologists, so why shouldn't someone write a book on the subject? What about Gynaecologists? Should they be seen as perverse too because they have an interest in the female reproductive system? Or pathologists, should they be considered weirdos because they have an interest that necessitates the dissection of cadavers? It takes all sorts to make a world and without those people who take an interest in subjects that some people find distasteful it would be a sorry world indeed.
Personally I can't be of any help to you on this subject, but good luck with your research Mani.
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Sorry if that sounded like a rant, it really wasn't meant to!
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Mani, have you got the Writers & Artists Year Book? If you're trying to get your work published, that will give you the best advice. You'll get it at any good book shop, or you'll find it in the public library.
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Mani,
You obviously don't understand anything about what you claim to be studying - if indeed you are. You seem to class 'learning difficulties' and 'mental health problems' together when they are in fact completely different conditions. For example, a woman suffering post natal depression after a child suffers a mental health problem but how can you question her right to enjoy a sexual relationship with her husband? A considerable percentage of the population suffer mental health problems such as depression, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder etc. Many are very intelligent people who have been affected by a low point in their life but who will return to occupy a valuable role in society. How can you question their right to a normal sex life and suggest the subject is taboo and that they should be sterilised?
With regard to sex between individuals with learning difficulties, this is a thorny subject surely in the light of history. To adopt a policy of forced sterilisation was termed 'Eugenics' in the early part of the 20 th century. The idea was that only the fit and healthy be encouraged to breed. Eugenics was actively practised in Nazi Germany and it's most noted advocates were Hitler and Churchill. The world left that barbarity behind years ago. Let's keep it there and not have nasty suggestions like that brought up by people like you who claim to be 'studying'.
You state that the system does not cope well with these groups. That is because the system shows as much ignorance, lack of understanding or compassion as individuals like you. Your ignorance and stupidity has been perfectly illustrated by your question.
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