Feminine Submission and Patriarchal Bloody Properganda
Last weekend I went to a lovely wedding. Lots of lovely church friends, lovely weather, the drinks were flowing (orange juice for me), party bags for the children to play with, I was in a wonderful mood until.............
The father "gave" the bride away. Did she belong to him?
The bride (a strong, independent woman who has travelled independently and has a professional career) promised to "obey" her husband. Why? What does he know that she doesnt?
The reading from Eph 5 managed to leave out the crucial "submit to one another" before getting into the wifely submission bit.
The sermon was not only totally "wives submit, you poor dears, cos your husband is like Christ and knows better" followed by what was pretty much an altar call "make the happy couple's day, become a Christian, that'll make them SO much happier on their wedding day"
I want to scream. At the Patriarchal propaganda of male ownership of the feminine. At the misreading of scripture, taking it out of context. At the assumption (though it was denied, it was inefectual) of male dominance in society and marriage. At the idea that somehow women are unfulfilled until marriage.
Just had to get this off my chest.
Mani Hussain Mon 28/07/08 19:12
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I am sorry, but you went to a church wedding and it upset you because The father gave the bride away and the bride....promised to "obey" her husband
Have you never been to a church wedding before or seen one on tv?
If you didn't 'know' that these would happen then I think you are very naive.
If it did spoil your 'wonderful mood', and if you let it show, then I think you are an inconsiderate person.
If you don't like religious festivals, then don't go.
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Question Author
I do like religious festivals, what I don't like is sexism. If everyone had an attitude like yours oneeyedvic women would still be unable to vote or go to work.
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Is it from religion that father is supposed to give his daughter away. Is it written anywhere in the Bible. But then again Mani, what you think is sexism it might be something there for a reason.
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We had a non-Christian festival in a hotel. My wife did not agree to 'obey' me.
She was 'given away' by her son.
I've never been called a sexist by someone who has no girlfriend (despite trying to get one) and are that shallow that they only like thin women.
I am not condoning sexism in any way shape or form.
My 'attitude' was that you should have known what to expect - it sounded like a 'normal' Christian ceremony, and by displaying your bad mood, you show yourself to be an inconsiderate person.
Their ceremony was not about you, but about them. If you don't like it, then you should not have attended.
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Mani, if you're a Christian, you must know that all these things are traditional and that those traditions probably go back to the days when girls weren't independent and didn't go out to work, and so were the responsibility of their fathers until they married. No one is compelled to walk down the aisle with anyone, or to promise to obey. People choose to do it because they want a traditional wedding, that's all. Your take on it smacks of the worst kind of potty political correctness - something, to my mind, always championed by miserable killjoys. It's simply nonsense to align the accepted tradition of a church wedding with sexism. If you ever have a daughter, Mani, are you going to spoil her big day by saying 'no' when she asks you to 'give her away'? I doubt it. I would hope you'd be proud to do it. The next time you go to a wedding, for heaven's sake just get the confetti out and celebrate with everyone else.
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fancy a glass naomi?
uh oh....this might start getting expensive.....
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Oh, what the hell! Damn the expense! Go for it!
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Mani listen to what Naomi says. OK.
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Question Author
My daughter would be quite welcome to be given away by her father, although she would have to find a new father because I will never become entangled in this filth!!
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Mani, That is so sad. I feel really sorry for you. This is simply tradition. Can't you understand that? Why spoil a girl's big day - and for nothing? For goodness sake, sort your brain out!
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