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There Is No Hell

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albaqwerty | 08:18 Sun 27th Sep 2015 | Religion & Spirituality
21 Answers
according to this student, there is definitely a God and a Heaven

Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?


Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:



First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving, which is unlikely.. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave.

Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.
Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:


1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it ?



If we accept the postulate given to me by Sandra during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.

The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct..... ....leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Sandra kept screaming 'Oh my God! Oh my God.'

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.
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Read it before.
Good, but should be in 'Jokes' really ;-)
Quite rightly too.

Best explanation I have ever heard.

Not going to bother trawling R&S in this site anymore.

I've been educated :-).

Thanks.
Brilliant. A well deserved A plus (my plus sign doesn't work)
+++++,,,,just for you Ummmm, don't waste them.
Cheers big ears :-)
'Twas a pleasure.
Got a few spares.
I went to Blackpool once for a conference, so I am pretty convinced that hell does indeed exist !
I love Blackpool.
You haven't been to Blacktown NSW Mikey.
If you need convincing.
what kind of conference would that have been Mikey?...don't be coy.
Labour Party possibly?
Now that would be hell. Shudder.
That Sandra sounds very fickle.
That Sandra sounds very normal...denying the existence of heaven..
Jomifi...it was the AGM of a small Friendly Society that I was a member of.
It was the end of May 1995 and a few Delegates and myself went on the tram ( which was very nice ! ) into the main entertainment area, which wasn't. Pools of sick everywhere, fights breaking out, etc.

We were staying in a castellated hotel, about 4-5 miles north of Blackpool, which was 'orrible, so I had better not mention its name ! The fire alarm kept going off all weekend, and in the end we stopped lining up in the car park. The food was dire. We were served lamb cutlets that were so undercooked that a good Vet could have brought them back to life. The rooms were filthy and some had plainly not been cleaned or had their linen changed.

It was so awful, that the Society refused to pay the hotel bill, until substantial amounts of money had been knocked off.

The sea front area was about as tacky as it could have been, and kept repeating itself every 100 yards or so.

Apart from the Trams, I have rarely had a worst weekend in a British Seaside resort. The Friendly Society moved around the country every year and everywhere else was lovely...Bournemouth, Torquay, Weston super mare, Southport, Llandudno, Brighton, Eastbourne, etc, etc.

You wouldn't get me back to Blackpool in a sack, tied at the top !
Morecambe may bear comparison with Blackpool even if only on the grounds of total boredom. I used to stay there when I was working in the area and one of the few things of which I am certain (thanks Frank) is that I would never go there on holiday.
I've seen this before. It's a tale well told but I strongly suspect that it's apocryphal. That being said, thanks 'albaqwerty' for posting this as not everyone will have read it and it nicely highlights the utter absurdity of the concept of hell.
Blackpool isn't that bad. There's nothing wrong with the place itself. Blackpool's biggest problem are the 'night tourists' - hen and stag parties blight the town centre. However, Blackpool is not just the town centre. There are some rather nice places just outside the centre that are very nice indeed: good parks, nice restaurants, nice pubs, etc. I know this because my sister-in-law lives there and I've been numerous times. The good bits are exist; the trick is knowing where to find them.
Old_Geezer
Read it before.
Good, but should be in 'Jokes' really ;-)
08:21 Sun 27th Sep 2015

I can see certain instances where one might find it rather difficult to distinguish one category from the other.
afterthought . . . not so unlike heaven and hell.
God is a god of love and wouldn't torture people-fire symbolizes eternal destruction for those who don't obey God, and it not literal

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