News1 min ago
Groan
A man is fishing and hooks a salmon, he reels it in and is just going to kill it for his dinner when the salmon looks at him and says, "Hey mate, don't kill me, I'm only a baby, I haven't swum the seven seas yet. Give me a chance pal."
The man looks at the salmon "Hey, you can talk?"
"Of course I can, go on put me back, there's much bigger fish under the
bridge."
"All right," says the man, "I'll put you back, what's your name?"
"Rusty," says the salmon, "And yours?"
"My name's Dave."
He puts the fish back in the water and resolves to say nothing to anyone, for fear that he'll become a laughing stock.
Ten years later he's fishing in the same spot and he hooks a monster. It takes him two hours to land it. He looks at it and pictures it on his dinner plate. Just then the salmon opens one eye and looks at him, "Dave, is that you?"
"Rusty, I don't believe it! It must be 10 years since I let you go, what have you been doing?"
"Well Dave, I've had a fantastic time. I've swum the seven seas and all the oceans. In fact, I've just come across the Atlantic, but I was really disturbed."
"Why's that Rusty?"
"Well, I was half way across and a voice told me to swim deeper, so I did, deeper and deeper and I found this huge shipwreck. I counted four funnels. It felt like death so I had to leave."
"Wow Rusty that was the Titanic. It sank and almost all on board were drowned."
"Ah, I knew it. In fact, I was so upset I had to sit down and write a poem about it," said Rusty.
"A poem? Don't talk daft, you're just a fish, how can you write a poem? That's rubbish."
"No Dave, really, it's available in all bookshops now."
"Ok," says Dave, "so what's it called then?"
"Salmon Rusty’s Titanic Verses!"
The man looks at the salmon "Hey, you can talk?"
"Of course I can, go on put me back, there's much bigger fish under the
bridge."
"All right," says the man, "I'll put you back, what's your name?"
"Rusty," says the salmon, "And yours?"
"My name's Dave."
He puts the fish back in the water and resolves to say nothing to anyone, for fear that he'll become a laughing stock.
Ten years later he's fishing in the same spot and he hooks a monster. It takes him two hours to land it. He looks at it and pictures it on his dinner plate. Just then the salmon opens one eye and looks at him, "Dave, is that you?"
"Rusty, I don't believe it! It must be 10 years since I let you go, what have you been doing?"
"Well Dave, I've had a fantastic time. I've swum the seven seas and all the oceans. In fact, I've just come across the Atlantic, but I was really disturbed."
"Why's that Rusty?"
"Well, I was half way across and a voice told me to swim deeper, so I did, deeper and deeper and I found this huge shipwreck. I counted four funnels. It felt like death so I had to leave."
"Wow Rusty that was the Titanic. It sank and almost all on board were drowned."
"Ah, I knew it. In fact, I was so upset I had to sit down and write a poem about it," said Rusty.
"A poem? Don't talk daft, you're just a fish, how can you write a poem? That's rubbish."
"No Dave, really, it's available in all bookshops now."
"Ok," says Dave, "so what's it called then?"
"Salmon Rusty’s Titanic Verses!"
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