Feeling Guilty For Falling Out With My Sister Cancer Scare

[gordiescotland1]

HI I fell out with my sister at Christmas time and we did not speak until last month. I said some terrible things to her. She went for a routine mammogram 3 weeks ago and was recalled to a clinic on tuesday where she had various tests and then biopsies were taken she has been told that there is something suspicious on her left breast she gets the results next tuesday. It is particulary worrying as my mum had it in December last year and my grandmother died from it so there is a particulary bad family history. She has 2 small boys. I feel so guilty and wish I could take back some of the things I said to her one thing I said was I hope something really bad happens to her. Now I am worried that may have caused this I know it sounds irrational but I feel awful.

[Tilly2]

What ever you said has made no difference to the outcome of her tests. You are not to blame.

[woofgang]

Of course you didn't cause it. Get in touch with your sister and make it up with her.

[pixie373]

You didn't cause it at all, you know that. It's just guilt from what you said before. I'm guessing you've spoken to her since hearing the news and that she understands people say things they don't mean in the heat of a row? If not, tell her. Best wishes for her recovery and treatment xx

[Psybbo]

Geordie, you have not caused this

[ChillDoubt]

Siblings often say things in the heat of the moment and regret them soon enough after.
Your words have caused nothing except some hurt feelings and I'm sure that after an apology and a bunch of flowers you'll soon be making up.
Family tend to forget what's happened and pull together in adverisity so now is your chance to make amends and heal and strengthen the bond.

[gordiescotland1]

I like your profile picture Chilldout

[ChillDoubt]

Cheers!

[Mamyalynne]

You didn't cause it , but you can start the ball rolling to make it better between you again.

[marval]

You had nothing to do with her situation. What you need to do is just let her know that you are there for her. All past things said need to be forgotten.

[joggerjayne]

Sometimes, when people are going through a worrying time, it's comforting that other people still behave normally towards them, rather than treating them in a "special needs" way.

It's normal for people to fall out and argue.

It's also normal to be strong and supportive when a family member needs it.

So hey, I'm sorry I lost my head. I was out of order wasn't I. And then ... be a supportive sister.

[black_cat51]

never mind, perhaps she also secret wishes something terrible would happen to you too

[Scarlett]

Tell her what you have told us here. You are really sorry about what you said- it was just cruel words in the heat of the moment. you didn't mean it and hope she will accept your apology.