Talking Centipede.........

Jeza | 23:09 Tue 08th Apr 2014 | Jokes

9 Answers

The Talking Centipede

A single guy decided life would be more fun
if he had a pet.

So he went to the pet store
and told the owner
that he wanted to buy an unusual pet.

After some discussion,
he finally bought a talking centipede,
which came in a little white box
to use for his house.

He took the box back home,
found a good spot for the box,
and decided he would start off
by taking his new pet
to the pub for a drink with him.

So he asked the centipede
in the box,
"Would you like to go
down the pub with me today?
We will have a good time."

But there was no answer
from his new pet..

This bothered him a bit,
but he waited a few minutes
and then asked again,
"How about going
down the pub with me ?"

But again,
there was no answer
from his new friend and pet.
So he waited
a few minutes more,
thinking about the situation.

The guy decided
to invite the centipede
one last time.

This time he
put his face up against
the centipede ' s box and shouted,
"Hey, in there!
Would you like to go
to
the pub with me?
.....
This time,
a little voice
came out of the box,

"I heard you the first time!

I 'm putting my f****** shoes on!"