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Denton | 23:48 Mon 10th Jul 2017 | ChatterBank
22 Answers
Fifty Shades of Grey by Pam Ayres

The missus bought a Paperback,
down Shepton Mallet way,
I had a look inside her bag;...
T'was "Fifty Shades of Grey".
Well I just left her to it,
And at ten I went to bed.
An hour later she appeared;
The sight filled me with dread.
In her left hand she held a rope;
And in her right a whip!
She threw them down upon the floor,
And then began to strip.
Well fifty years or so ago;
I might have had a peek;
But Mabel hasn't weathered well;
She's eighty four next week!!
Watching Mabel bump and grind;
Could not have been much grimmer.
And things then went from bad to worse;
She toppled off her Zimmer!
She struggled back upon her feet;
A couple minutes later;
She put her teeth back in and said
"I am a dominator!!"
Now if you knew our Mabel,
You'd see just why I spluttered,
I'd spent two months in traction
For the last complaint I'd uttered.
She stood there nude and naked
Bent forward just a bit
I went to hold her, sensual like
and stood on her left tit!
Mabel screamed, her teeth shot out;
My God what had I done!
She moaned and groaned then shouted out:
"Step on the other one!!"
Well readers, I can tell no more;
Of what occurred that day.
Suffice to say my jet black hair,
Turned fifty shades of grey!!

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I will also add, welcome to AB Denton - you've started on a good note, enjoy.
01:17 Tue 11th Jul 2017
Lol.. Very good. She is clever Pam Ayers..
I'm glad you shared it, that is hilarious
I love, love, love Pam Ayres. Thank you for posting this, Denton.
LOL. Just brilliant !
Fab , thank you!
Pam Ayres, she's still got it:-)
very good.

Rhymes and everything, like proper poetry.
Brilliant :-)
Brilliant, thank you for posting that.
I will also add, welcome to AB Denton - you've started on a good note, enjoy.
Enjoyed that, ta Denton :-)
Sometimes Pam Ayres annoys me. It's personal because she can write better rhymes than I can. :-)

She is good,but I am often mis-understood
So enough said, I am off to bed.

Humorous Hans.!!
Very funny, thanks.
I love it! :o}
Very funny person, t heard of Pam for awhile, I see she still has her wit.
i can just picture her cheeky smile as she narrates it :-)

ooh, she's good is Pam !!

thanks for sharing x
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Thank you for the welcome,mamyalynne.
Brilliant!

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