jokes

[emmie]

know any funny ones, or some that can be put on here without causing an uproar, i will kick it off

what do you call a mushroom who buys all the drinks..

a fungi to be with..


off you go..

[maggiebee]

Duh, got the punchline wrong!

What lies at the bottom of the ocean and shakes

A nervous wreck!

[DTCwordfan]

how does an eskimo make his house?

he glues it together.....

[cupid04]

Why do traffic lights rarely go swimming?


Because they take much too long to change!

[cupid04]

Where can you obtain virgin wool?


From a really ugly sheep?

[cupid04]

Why do cats hate flying saucers?


Because it's impossible for them to drink their milk!

[DTCwordfan]

cupid - how dare you insult my bretheren: everybody knows virgin wool comes from a welshman.

I am reminded of the quote about yourself:

"I don’t know why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine’s Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon."

[DTCwordfan]

and certainly not from sheep here in Cornwall!

[cupid04]

I refuse to trade insults with you, DT crosswordfan. I think your cute. Your in
second place after shooty!

[DTCwordfan]

I'm blushing now, cupid, thank you....

[Prudie]

What do you call a deaf crow?
Anything you like he can't hear you.

[emmie]

all good, sorry i didn't get back, but cheery for another wet and dreary day, so cheers all

[emmie]

two men having a drink in a pub

one man says to the other, your round,

the other says so are you, you fat bstard

[boxtops]

What do you call a man buried under leaves?

>

>

Russell

[tenrec]

What do you call a man with rabbits up his @rse?
Warren

[sophie_1003]

What do you call a man with a seagull on his head?
Cliff

[imagcq]

what do you call 40 chickens playing hide and seek fowl play

[imagcq]

they had sliced white today which is a good job because i didnt have my bike

[DTCwordfan]

What would you call the definition of surprise?
Answer: A fart with a lump in it.

[cupid04]

What do you call a man with a spade on his head?


Doug!

[cupid04]

My brother had a blow up doll
as a girlfriend, but she dumped
him. I asked why and she said: he
kept letting me down!