Jokes in The AnswerBank

Looking for a laugh? There are plenty of funny jokes being told on The AnswerBank, so sit back, relax and have a read.


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1. An insect just flew into my living room and exploded. I think it was a Jihadi- longlegs. 2. A shoplifter stole a penis pump from an Ann Summers shop. The Police said they are looking for a hardened...
A van carrying a dozen movie stuntmen on the way to a film location in the mountains spun out of control on the icy road, and crashed through a guardrail. It rolled down a 90-foot embankment, turned...
My dad's cement business is on the rocks. I told him he should sell it before he goes bankrupt. He won't though. He's too set in his ways....
Bruce is driving across Sydney Harbour bridge when he spots his girlfriend hanging over the edge. He pulls up and says "G'Day Sheila - what the hell you doing"? In a tearful voice Sheila blubs "You...
how do i post jokes on here
I have my blankie, you have your caffeine. Enough said. Don't be jealous, but I think I'm in love with my teddy bear. I know where the remote control is, but it'll cost you. To you, it's just an empty...
After recent trip to Japan I developed a fascination with origami. So I decided to come home and start a shop selling origami products. Things started off fine, but then fell away. Eventually the...
The top fifteen jokes from The Edinburgh Fringe. http://news.sky.com/story/heart-donation-gag-takes-edinburgh-festival-fringe-award-10548277...
There was drama on the plane returning from Brazil, with the British Olympic team . Apparently Tom Daley had to be restrained from opening the door of the plane . He said he wanted to have another go...
Pension sex Two men were talking. 'So, how's your sex life?' 'Oh, nothing special. I'm having Pension sex.' 'Pension sex?' 'Yeah, you know; I get a little each month, but not enough to live on!' LOUD...
A rather large lady showed up at the theatre just before the performance started and handed the usher two tickets. "Where's the other party?" asked the usher. "Well," said the lady, with a blush, "you...
A man was assaulted and mugged at Legoland. Police are putting the pieces together so they can build a case....
A Hotel guest calls the Front desk and the clerk answers, "May I help you?" The man says, "Yes, I'm in room 858. You need to send someone to my room immediately. I'm having an argument with my wife...
Two monocles got together and made a spectacle of themselves!
On hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent's house to visit her 95 year old grandmother and comfort her. When she asked how her grandfather...
Paddy asked his friend Bob what he was doing. Bob replied"I am working on aqua-thermal treatment of ceramics, aluminium and steel under a constrained environment!" Paddy was impressed until Bob's wife...
I went to a pub quiz last night and there were some very odd questions during one of the rounds. They were about how small bits of fruit were cheating on each other. The subject was currant affairs....
Despite getting A-Level results of A,B,B,A it seems no employer will take a chance on me.
THE AMAZING EXERCISE FOR PEOPLE OVER 60 Begin by standing on a comfortable surface, where you have plenty of room at each side. With a 5-lb potato bag in each hand, extend your arms straight out from...
Hillary Clinton decided to send Donald Trump a letter to let him know how she felt about him. Trump opened the letter and it appeared to contain a single line coded message; 370HSSV 0773H Trump was...

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