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At first i was afraid...I was petrified !
- the local ramblers club today, and this bloke just went on and on.
One day 3 women went to the top of a helter skelter at the fairground. There was a black haired, brown haired, and a blonde haired woman. When they got to the top a genie appeared from nowhere and...
-- that flowers had sex organs POPPYCOCK!...
Into a Dublin pub comes Paddy Murphy. He looks as if he's just been run over by a train. His right arm is in a sling, his nose is broken, his face is cut to ribbons, he’s bruised and he’s walking...
In a Chicago hospital, a gentleman had made several attempts to get into the men's restroom, but it had always been occupied. A nurse noticed his predicament. Sir, she said "You may use the ladies...
"Yesterday, scientists revealed conclusive results that all beers contain small traces of female hormones. To prove their theory, the scientists gave 100 men 12 pints of beer to drink. 100% of them...
1. There are 10 different kinds of people. Those who understand binary, and those who don't. 2. Police stop Heisenberg for speeding and ask do you know how fast you were going? He replies, no, but I...
One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut he asked about his bill and the barber replied 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The florist was...
A Judge is just about to pass sentence on the accused man and he asks him. '' Prisoner at the bar, do you wish to say anything before I pass sentence?'' The accused looks back at the judge and says ''...
- - naturalists do with lists of animal classifications? Phylum...
I posted this on Food this morning with its references to chicken in it, the theme being how to make a chicken juicy. Worthy of jokes though..... A Sligo Mum's Letter to her daughter... Dear Daughter,...
While stitching a cut on the hand of a 75 year old farmer, whose hand was caught in the squeeze gate while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man. Eventually the topic...
Little Freddie's mother was in the hospital after having given birth, and he was paying a visit to see his new brother. He wandered into an adjoining room which was occupied by a woman with a broken...
William Shatner once set up a luxury lingerie company but it never really took off. It wasn’t the garments that let him down, it was his choice of company name. He’ll rue the day he decided to...
what colour that dress is [i]one more time[i], I'm going to beat them white and gold....
My work as a bookkeeper is becoming more difficult. Every library in the area has a photo of me....
..over seven feet, but with a head the size of an orange, walks up to the bar in a pub and asks the barman for a pint of beer. He looks so odd that the barman can't resist asking him, "You're a huge...
Extracts from letters written by council tenants: 1. It's the dogs mess that I find hard to swallow. 2. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off. 3. I wish to...
Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant. While having a bite to eat, they talk about their moonshine operation. Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eatin...g a sandwich, begins to cough. After...

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