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....with this girl the other night, she wore this real slinky number
She looked great going down the stairs....
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..the spiritual leader of tibet, he sent me a large goat with a long neck
Turns out I phoned dial a lama....
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... count to ten in French: un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq, six, sept… Aarrgghh! Sorry, I’ve got a huit allergy....
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...been playing golf with a female dog. It was bitch & putt......
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....just rung up the amputee help line & got cut-off......
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...caught an infection at my karate class....it was Kung Flu....
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....on the Oliver Twist diet...it's gruelling....
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...secret of easy origami is twofold.....
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...sudden urge to sing The Lion Sleeps Tonight is just a whim away.....
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An executive was scheduled to speak at an important convention, so he asked one of his employees to write him a punchy, 20-minute speech. When the executive returned from the big event, he was...
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A man was crushed to death by hundreds of boxes of chocolates. He tried, in vain, to attract attention, but it appears that every time he shouted "The Milky Bars are on me!!" people cheered....
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What are your Height of jokes..? Like: Q, What is the height of patience? A. Standing in the middle of the Sahara desert waiting for the tide to come in! Have fun everyone, and thanks in advance....
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.....I was having dinner with Garry Kasparov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.
It took him two hours to pass me the salt....
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Put this on JJ's thread last night - it's fun..... Holiday Fruitcake Recipe You'll need the following: 1 C water 1 C sugar 1 C brown sugar 4 large eggs lemon juice 1 tsp. baking soda 2 C dried fruit...
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When the inventor of the drawing board messed things up, what did he go back to?...
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I had a secret meeting with a detective last night. He said it was better if I didn't know his name, then extended his hand for me to shake. That was a bit of a giveaway, Inspector Gadget. I took this...
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In ancient Israel , it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dorothy. And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of...
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Is it just me, or do you find that most vacuum cleaners today suck?!!
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A pretty little girl named Suzy was standing on the pavement in front of her home. Next to her was a basket containing a number of tiny creatures; in her hand was a sign announcing “FREE KITTENS”...
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When asked in a pub quiz a while ago " Do you have a vulva?" My sons friend quite innocently said " Nah mate, I got a D reg Orion"....
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