Donate SIGN UP

Is age 5 too young

Avatar Image
factor-fiction | 10:45 Tue 21st Feb 2012 | News
47 Answers
http://uk.lifestyle.y...to-become-a-girl.html

"Zach Avery was three when he started questioning his gender, and began wearing dresses and ribbons in his hair."

Is it too young or were the family and medical experts right to take action at such an early stage?
Gravatar

Answers

1 to 20 of 47rss feed

1 2 3 Next Last

Avatar Image
When I was young children were kept in dresses for a very long time, probably until three. My mother said the gypsies would steal them if they knew they were boys but they didn't bother if they thought they were girls. Load of rubbish of course, and I didn't believe it (honestly). My grandson wanted a teaset for his birthday when he was four and don't they all play...
12:56 Tue 21st Feb 2012
If he instinctively feels like a girl then why distress him by insisting he dresses acts like a boy...at that age he may still grow out of it especially when puberty hits, so long as he is loved for who he/she is and supported by his parents it has to be healthier than being forced into a mould that feels unnatural. Sounds like the parents are making some sensible compromises as are his school.
Probably.

I blame Dora: "suddenly he became obsessed with Dora the Explorer and started dressing in girls clothes."
I wonder if this young child was not encouraged by his mother at such an early age?

/// Zach Avery was three when he started questioning his gender, and began wearing dresses and ribbons in his hair. ///

At 3 years old, was he really old enough question his gender, and to automatically start to wear dresses and put ribbons in his hair ?

I cannot see it myself, unless these female items were easily made available to him, and placed on him by his mother.
This finding is so bizarre that I wonder what kind of tests could possibly confirm the diagnosis. After all, if the child shows a preference for toys which are usually associated with girls, or girly clothes, what are we to make of the many tiny tomboys who prefer 'boys' toys', prefer trousers, and who grow up to be normal women?
We wouldn't allow a child of five's evidence in a court to be accepted without corroboration, if at all possible, because he is 'without understanding ' He may invent, imagine, fantasize, or simply go along with whatever he senses the required response to questions is.This appears to ignore that obvious principle.
I'm slightly conflicted about this having never met Zach obviously. On one hand I do think five is awfully young to be truly aware of your gender, on the other he's clearly expressing a desire to be female. Kids from a young age do know their own minds on such things, my eldest son is gay and tbh always has been since he was a wee mite ( he preferred to dress up, paint his nails, insisted he wanted to be a singer with ' beautiful dresses' etc) whilst all his brothers were doping far more blokey things. I think ultimately his parents are the best people to make the determinaiton of how he neds to be raised, and since the psychologists agree I can't argue with that. Good luck to them all.
I imagine he's probably been to see a paediatric endocrinologist who has run tests. We have a clinic here although I don't work for them. I learnt when I worked for another team in this hospital that it is not simply a matter of XY, and that some people can be male/female on a genetic level. It's all quite complex as I understand it.
Nothing definitive will happen until he approaches puberty anyway... at that point he may need drugs to delay or prevent it
Even if it turns out his brain is miswired so he feels feminine, and will do so throughout his life, it is still too young to encourage this path rather than try to encourage an acceptance of feeling feminine whist knowing that he is really male.

I consider the expert opinion to be irrisponsible. The brain as well as the body changes as a person grows into adulthood, there is no imperative to take the young guy down this road at this time.
he may change his mind he may not ~I'd have loved girly clothes when I was young but was brought up to be a tomboy always in trousers/dungarees my mum wanted sons though...
OG

I don't think the experts are necessarily encouraging his behaviour - they're just advising not to DIScourage it (fine detail, but important distinction). At the moment (this is in the story as reported in Metro newspaper) when he's referred to as a boy, he gets extremely upset and has even attempted to cut his penis off!

It appears to me that the expert opinion is to let it travel where it may, but to not force it one way or the other, because that's where real psychological damage may lay.
A kid of 5 can't possibly have any comprehension of this. Sad case of attention seeking parents using a child to get the attention they crave. If ever there's a case for social services to take away the child this is it.
d9f1c7 - What a very un-informed answer.
well inform me then! You cannot seriously be saying that this kid has decided to change sex on his own!
Why should I inform you? You have already made your mind up. Never mind that I have already stated that he has or will probably have endocrinology involvement or that the psychologists (vastly more experienced and knowledgable than you) have been involved or that GID is easy to google. If you are interested in forming an informed opinion then you could read up on any of these things and make up your mind based on fact but it seems that you prefer to make a sweeping generalisation without actually looking at the facts... so who am I to take that away from you.
I think there is a rather thin line at best between encouraging something and not discouraging it, especially when it involves letting the little guy act out of his born gender. He'd be better helped by being guided to accept who he is, and not consider mutilating himself. I suspect it is consdiered easier to just let the child get on with it. As for the school, we know children can be cruel, and I do not anticipate this road leading to anything other than continuous teasing and making his life a misery.
Hello! He's 5! For Funks Sake!
Another well thought out answer.
I take on board all the Psycho/medical stuff but what we have here is a 5 year old boy, at that age do they even know what gender is? For christ sake at that age my main concern was whether it was jelly or ice cream for tea! Do you really think all this occurred to him on his own? Wake up and smell the coffee please! Save this kid before he gets hacked about through some trendy theory by "experts" and even worse, pushy attention seeking parents.
-- answer removed --
you really think the parents have invented all this themselves in order to get... a story on Yahoo?

1 to 20 of 47rss feed

1 2 3 Next Last

Do you know the answer?

Is age 5 too young

Answer Question >>