dilemma

[hannah40]

my partner has a grown up son in his late 20,s who is married and have 2 young children.my partner and i also have 2 young children .the thing is when it is my childrens birthdays ect his older son doesnt buy our children pressys we dont have much contact with his older son due to ex wife causing problems.so im not bothered by this but when it comes to my partners sons kids birthdays we have always given them a pressy but this year i feel i dont want to i only want to give them a card but my partner said if he doesnt buy them a pressy his son will phone him or text and say sarcastically they are your grandchildren dont you think any thing of them not to buy them pressys now i would feel like saying it works both ways its your sisters you dont buy for but i dont say anything as my partner says it will make things worse.so what shall i do just buy them a pressy anyway or just a card what would you do?thanks

[redcrx]

I think that i would buy the grandchildren presents, they are inncoent in all of this and perhaps in the future they will see that their grandad continued to treat them as his grandchildren even when faced with the coldness of his son,

[karenmac60]

I agree, the children have done nothing wrong here. I have a 14 year old and have been with my husband for 6 years. In all that time his mum and sister have never given my daughter as much as a birthday card - it was her birthday on Tuesday and OH made sure he mentioned it beforehand (they always say they didn't know), but still nothing. She says it doesn't bother her, but I can tell how hurt she is and it's so unfair on her.

[joko]

i would sign the card with your daughters names, instead of yours...and if old enough even get them to make the card and if possible have yours kids present his kids with the (small) gift...this may make him think

but dont punish the kids