what would constitute being grounded for a month ? eliminating pocket money and banning friends round. Oh yes and MSN ?
Losing everything your mum buys for you?
Is a month harsh ?
Katie. x
DONNNAKEBAB Thurs 08/05/08 21:27
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What on earth has your child done???
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Question Author
See my previous post hun.
I am so frustrated and upset by this. I seem to be working for nothing and only for her to take things for granted.
Katie. x
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Ok - I've read that post and I can undersand your frustration. It's as if she doesn't get how big these 'accidents'/'incidents' are and that mummy will just replace the things that get broken/lost. I think that if you equate her possesions to what you have to pay, ie, MSN costs a pair of glasses per month, she might get the idea - worth a try, but you might be swimming uphill in porridge!!
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Katie, I read your other post. If I was in your situation I would take away all luxuries and privileges, not for just a month but until she learn to be more responsible. Deceiving and going to the park would have me questioning everything she now says. Just the thought of anything scary could have happened to her in the park sends shivers.
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Question Author
Dear Figure and Hippy Hoppy. Thanks so much for that. Once I had calmed down last night I sat with her and asked her to write down in what way she could be more responsible. In fact however, if you revert back to my other post, perhaps I am at fault too here. She says she thought that it would be okay to go to the park because I had taken her there the other night and to be fair, I do beleive her.
I will have to calm down a bit more and talk to her rather than shout, take away a couple of things for the time being and re think the whole situation.
I dont like to think of Tilly as a liar, she is very considerate around others (apart from me) but then again, who's fault is that - if I give her everything. MINE EH !
Thanks again you guys.
Katie.
x
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I have just replied on your other post too but would like to add I think communication is far more important than grounding children etc. The main thing is they understand what they have done wrong and why you were so worried rather than just grounding her. Is the park that far away? I think at nearly 11 she probably needs a little freedom I know its a dangerous world we live in but you can't keep kids locked up! Obviously the main issue is your daughter went somewhere without you knowing where she was as long as she knows she must tell you in future maybe she could be allowed some places on her own? Within reason of course and not at night time.
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Question Author
I just want to add another thanks to all you guys................................ I took your advice and very seriouslly on board. I feel such a failure at times. Anyway, with the time thing, I thought we could work together in making a flyer to post around everywhere near the park, shop windows, trees etc and we printed this off and went out and put them all up.
LOW AND BEHOLD AND YOU WILL NOT BELEIVE THIS.................................
As we walked through the park ..........................THERE IT WAS, the brace, staring at me in the face in the grass !
I have always beleived there is a God and now I beleive it more.
Nevertherless, your support has been fantastic and a few lessons have been learnt by this to me as a parent.
Thanks again and again and again.
Love Katie x
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I understood your last post about this was a joke Katie!!!!!??
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Question Author
No ice it wasnt a joke hun. We found the brace. is that what you meant.
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No hun, no - I replied seriously, but I meant about the three grand for dental treatment, the cruise, the holiday, the.......
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Question Author
No Ice, it wasnt a joke. I did pay the three grand for the dental work and am still paying it courtesy of a re mortgage because my daughter has a cross bit and I wasnt happy with her having to wait for 3 years on the NHS to get an appointment. No, I am not joking about the cruise, holiday etc either. I set out to have nice things in life for both myself and my daughter and I cant say that I dont work hard for it. I simply find it frustrating when she loses things and doesnt appreciate, thus, my taking all advice on here re it seriously.
Thank you again.
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i know people that have had to pay for a brace coz the waiting list was long very expensive to
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