Birds and Bees

[miacat]

Hello, what is everyone's opinion about the right age for telling your children the VERY BASIC facts of life? My son is almost 7 and I fear he will hear things in school he does not understand - I don't remember how old I was but don't want to leave it until he's old enough to be embarrassed! What do others think?

[andy-hughes]

The best way to aproach this is by laying down some simple rules.

Without making it a big deal, tell your son tht he is getting a big boy now, and he will hear stories about mums and dads from people at school, and he may not understand. Tell him that you will always tell him the truth, and if he has any questions at all, he must not be shy about asking you, and it's nothing wrong or dirty, it's part of growing up.

Then wait for the questions - and be honest, within his ability to understand, at this age, keep it nice and simple.

The important thing is to build a feeling of openess and lack of embarassment between you - which may be easier for him than for you, but you need to set this in motion now - for when he is older.

I certainly wouldn't sit him down for 'the talk' as the previous generation did - you'll probably scare him silly!

Be ready for his questions - and stress that this applies in all areas of his life - he can talk to you about anything - and hopefully he will.

Good luck.

[cameo]

I agree with andy-hughes.
I have 2 children and like you i was concerned about how to approach this subject.
with my kids i waited till they mentioned something themselves and then sat them down and asked them what they wanted to know and then i just explained it to them in a simple way - not too much detail!
i then told them that if they ever want to know anything they only had to ask me i would tell them.
This seemed to work as i have had very 'open' conversations with them since.

good luck and try not to worry x

[mandimoo]

my mum told me when she was pregnant with my little sister and i wanted to know what the lump was and of course, how it got there. i was only 3 or 4. a few years later, maybe around 9 or 10 she announced she was going to tell me the 'facts of life' and was flabbergasted that i remembered what she'd told me many years before. i dont think it did me any harm!

[miacat]

Thanks so much for all your helpful advice - I think maybe I WAS overreacting - it's hard not to! I'll just let him take the lead and go from there - thanks everyone!