I have been with my BF for about 5 - 6 months and we had a chat the other night, we said that if either of us met anyone else or slept with anyone else we should just be honest with each other about it.
We spend pretty much every day together and after thinking about it now, he obviously does not want to commit. I feel like I deserve more, he says that I would have a lot to offer to someone. I would miss him a lot if I didnt see him, I think thats what I am most worried about. Should I waste my time with this when as soon as he meets someone he would go off with them. I'm confused!!!
SazzyC0 Mon 06/10/08 10:35
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It would be interesting to see how he would react if you were the one to be the first to say you'd met someone else - I don't think he'd want the relationship to be so open then.
Open relationships only work when it is genuinely what both parties want - and that's rare.
If he doesn;t want commitment but you do, then move on. Better to be on your own than be with someone who is only with you until someone better/ different/ new comes along.
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good answer salla
let me know sazzyCo if you want to pursue what salla as suggested ;0)
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you've had a chat and agreed that if either of you met someone else, it would be best to be honest. you agreed, "we said"!
how did you get from that to assuming he wants anything you don't?
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Question Author
It was about 2am and we were drunk, but thinking about it, it's not what I want.
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2am and p!ssed is not really the best time to seriously discuss something like this lol
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have another chat when you're sober. things may be much better than you think.
NK, behave!
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Question Author
I just don't understand how he can be like that but when we are together it is just like we are a 'normal' couple.
Men confuse me. I just dont know whether to get out of this sooner rather than later and risk being hurt. I need to get this sorted because obviously whenever he goes out I can't trust him. I told him I would be p'd off if he did sleep with anyone else and he said he would if I did. We are going on holiday together and everything. What is going on in his head! Can any men enlighten me?
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What is going on in his head?
He wants to have his cake and eat it...
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men confuse you do they?
how different that is to men understanding women, We know exactly where your comming from all the time .
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Question Author
I suppose men are a lot simpler!!
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Question Author
Well you know what they say...some women are for marrying.....
I'm obviously just not the marrying type! I think i'm just going to start staying at home with my cat and a bottle of Gin. I would probably be quite content then, no complications.
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poor bloke, he hasn't said anything that you haven't said! maybe he's as unhappy as you today, thinking you're about to jump into bed with someone else.
talk to him. I'm sure you can sort this out. you've had a drunken chat and agreed on some principle for something that may never happen.
bizarre!
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Your cat drinks Gin? Cool!
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or have a drink.. that obviously aids your perception!
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in that case Sazzy you will fit in well with this lot cats and booze are recurring topics on here.............there's some right p*ssheads!
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Question Author
You are right, I will talk to him later. I just dont want to have an arument, he can get a bit mardy.
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I only became attached to alcohol once I found men... ;-)
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and I only realised how attractive my cat was when I started dating men ;o)
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