Thank you for your replys i know she is thinking ahead i would not take from her if we split but when we moved in together it was a brand new start and then i got told i can not have my name on anything and looking at what she wants off me is just about all my wages also she does not want any of my mail there either.
we get on very well and love each other lo0l
TheRoz Thurs 03/07/08 11:41
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yeah right, sounds more one sided to me. Its as if youre just there to pay for her house.
Sit her down and tell her what you want from this.
ps. you can reply to your own message, it keeps everything together
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Question Author
She is a great women i feel there is something a drift i find it hard to talk as when i do express myself everthing goes tits up I have got debt from a past relation ship but it is all dealt with.
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you're not allowed your post there?? you really need to sit her down and ask her what her problem is
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Question Author
I will talk to her later as it has rattled me.
we have been living together for 11 weeks now but been together for 18 months .I feel a litle let down.
.The other thing is why are some women so scared of there bullying ex@?
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she sounds like a money grabbing cow, why can't your post go there?
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are you saying she has been bullied by an ex and is scared? Maybe this is the underlying problem then and no wonder she's like this. If she was treated badly or went through a relationship where she was left in alot of debt then I can completely understand why she would be a bite more causious you need to sit her down and reasute her. x
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Question Author
Her EX is a big mouth bully she paid him off after he lft her some years ago for another women she has still got a 13 yro child together but he can still give her what for.
I have asured her i am in it with her for her not for finantial gain. Myself i have lost 2 houses over Ex's.
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this is sounding like a soap opera.
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then you both need to reasure eachother xxx. Good luck
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Question Author
Thanks all for your answers i will close this one and post what answers i got from her tomorow
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Right, after reading your posts and all the replies, I have to put down what I think...I have been in a similar situation to your ex, and to me it sounds as if she is afraid of loosing everything again and starting from square one, like with the post and that, she doesnt want any record of you being there, just in case it goes wrong and you could take her to court and say, I have been living there, look all my post has been going there for the last 2 years! Shes just covering her back....allthough if my fella ends up moving in with me I certainly wouldnt take all his money and I would expect to go half on everything
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Maybe she thinks that if your post is delivered to the house that will affect her credit rating (due to your previous financial difficulties). I don't know if that's still the case though.
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Question Author
Naa she just does not want any of my dealings . I have taken a policy out to cover her if i get killed and it will pay off her mortgage or if i suffer a major loss of myself it pays up too. I took this out as i had no money to put into the new property but like i say i am not with her for money just wondered why people can be like this in a loving reltationship.
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The reason she is like this in your loving relationship is cos shes scared....but you should sort out the finances about her paying her share!!!
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I'm sorry and i don't mean to sound harsh but if you have a past debt then thats why she hasnt put you as responsible for her bills. Also that is probably why she doesnt want you to get post at the house because that would mean that your bank account and other related stuff is then transferred to that address which may end up being bad for her credit.
11 weeks is not very long at the end of the day and you cant expect to have rome built over night. Presumably the mortgage is in her name because you couldnt get one in yours??
Take the relationship for what it is...perhaps address how much you are paying her and sort out a reasobale way to do it so your not broke maybe??
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Mate I told you man up. get your act together she is shafting you something rotten here. She is puttin a rubber ball in your mouth and ridin you like a pony. Tell her it takes 2 to tango and if she doesn't like it you move out. BTW as of now you stop paying for anything that you aren't legally apart of.
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