Can i moan?

[tinkerbell23]

Please can i?

Im going to anyhow :0/

Have you ever been in a situ where not one of your friends are in the same boat as you?

Everyone has kids now (eek!!) or a partner. Not me!

Hoping when i begin work ill meet like minded folk- my best friend has no kids, but is moving a few miles away with her bf...soo happy for her, but ill miss her.

Everytime i go for lunch or even up for a glass of wine to a mates theres usuay a kid or 5... In the nicest possible way, i dont always want to be around kids so i do avoid it sometimes??

My facebook is plastered with photos of all the kids (very cute) and im now getting the speeches about how one day ill have all this and "be complete" grrrr

Thing is i dont know if i even want any because im scared i wouldnt be a good mum, or make my kids feel like my mum makes me feel (not good!) or worse !!

Mentioned this just as a chat to the parents- mum replies tht i have to get myself a bf, as i dont seem capable of that.

Wish she would credit me with the fact i devoted the past 3y to uni, ive done EVERYTHING possible to get a job- start september.....

Gave up my flat to move home due to uni despite the volatile relationship we have. ALOT has came up in my counselling regarding this.

Im afraid im not like her pals kids who are all marrying off. Sometimes it feels like i cant be me. Sorrry for the moan. I went and told all to my gran- we are as thick as theives!!! Love her- shes more like my mum!!! Had been confiding in an aunt, but its been gettin back to mother :0(

At least i had my car to go and stay elsewhere for last night xxx

Sorry again for moaning- its all i do on here! Somewhere to turn xx

[anneasquith]

tink, you are on JSA, so would qualify for housing benefit, you could sell your car and get a deposit for a flat.

[tinkerbell23]

Its a means to an end just now!

Sometimes its all sugar or all sh*te you know?

Ill stick here for now- the cars actually a blessing i can just hop in and drive x

[oldmaninshorts]

You stay there and accept money????
Well you know what side your bread is buttered then.

[oldmaninshorts]

Sorry to dissolution you but you cannot just "hop in and drive" you need petrol to do that.

[tinkerbell23]

I have petrol. So i can just drive to a friends locally.

Yeah i do. Its difficult to feel the way i do yet not have much choice. I also have money or items forced at me even if i dont want them.

6wks ill be self sufficient. If you have at all read this you would see that my bread is definately NOT buttered but thanks for the input x

[pizza]

Well said tinks and def not the best comment to make if looking to make friends on a/b some people don't take the trouble to read and understand the post and wade in with big feet !

[lcg]

tinks....what you describe is enforced dependency. your mum knows that you have no other option at the moment and appears to be so kind and generous; yet what that parenting comes with is spite, malice and psychological warfare instead of the guiding hand disguise it is meant to be.

my mother did the same so she could say to others 'see! what a great mother i am!' whilst snarling at me behind closed doors that i was useless, always would be and greedy. when in actual fact, supporting children is what parents do (well, decent ones anyway - i know i do) but without the negative emotional blackmail that goes with it. some people will always come on and shoot their mouth off about what they think of the situation.....but your friends on here do know what you are going through. if it were me, i think i would have gone mad already (i escaped my parents house at two days past my 16th birthday and never went back). i wish you all the luck in the world for your new start and the strength and courage to carry on until you are there. lisa x

[Psybbo]

Tinks, we've all been there but if you do have children in the future your experience of a jealous person will make you a better mother love and hugs

[tinkerbell23]

Ha lisa i think i have gone mad! I certainly feel it!!!!!'

Thanks for the support all of you!! I feel that you really do understand!!!

Its sooo appreciated xxx

[tinkerbell23]

Im feeling crappy tonight again LOL

I think i better get used to the nights in alone....boo :0/

[JonnyBoy12]

Can you moan?

It depends on how good in bed we are together, tinks!

Naughty eh?

[tinkerbell23]

Pmsl...very J lol xx